𝐈𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 | Jaywon | ✔

16

Jay gently rubs some cream on my back. "Your whole back is blue and purple," says Jay. "Weird," I remark. Jay then helps me put on a shirt he got from his closet."Better shower tomorrow," he says and I nod. "Make yourself comfortable yes? I'm going to take a shower" he says softly and I nod again. "Jay" I say and Jay turns around questioningly."I'm glad you're fine," I say and Jay smiles before he takes a shower. 

I actually wanted to go down to the others again, but somehow I don't feel able to do so. I put on a pair of sweatpants that Jay gave me and sit on the bed. It's really really beautiful here. It's kind of a shame to know we won't be staying here forever. I feel how tired I actually am and lean against the wall. 

A few minutes later I hear Jay coming out of the small bathroom in our room. I'm too exhausted to open my eyes. I smile as I feel him sit next to me.When his quiet voice sounds, I open my eyes."Are you too tired or do you want to eat something?" he then asks. I look at him and briefly consider "I'd rather eat something". "I'll bring you something," he says and gets up again. I also stand up "I want to come with you". Jay turns to me "Just rest. You are totally exhausted". I shake my head "but I want to come with you" I say firmly and Jay sighs. He helps me go down the stairs. 

Downstairs, Sunoo, Jake, and Izumi are seated at the dining table. I sit down with the three of them at the table and Jay goes into the kitchen. Izumi smiles briefly and then gets up to go to the kitchen as well. 

"Are you hurt Jungwon?" asks Sunoo. I nod "on the back. I don't know exactly what," I answer, shrugging my shoulders. "Is Heeseung sleeping?" I then turn to Jake, who responds with a nod. "Sunghoon and Niki are in the garden," Sunoo informs. "I'm going to see Heeseung," Jake says and also gets up from the table. 

Sunoo turns to the kitchen door and then looks at me again. "Are you dating Jay?" he asks in a low voice. I smile slightly and shake my head. "But you would like to be hm?" Sunoo grins. Sunoo really knows me too well. "How long have you been like this? You guys are really cute," says Sunoo. "I don't know...I think I've always had a soft spot for him but I didn't want to see it," I admit. "Well, I think he loves you more than you love him," Sunoo notes. I look at my best friend in amazement "can you say that for sure?" "Any mole could tell you that," Sunoo nods. I lower my gaze and smile. Maybe I really should tell him. Maybe we have a chance.

At that moment, Jay comes back out of the kitchen. He has a plate and a drink in his hand, which he is now putting on the table. "Mom said she'll take a look at your back," he tells me and I nod. He sits down on one of the chairs and also eats a bit.

As I'm about to finish eating, Izumi reappears. Meanwhile, Sunghoon and Niki also showed up, who also grabbed some food. I take off my shirt again. "Ouch. That looks really bad," notes Sunghoon."It's a severe bruise. It looks awful and hurts even worse, but it will go away on its own. This may take a few weeks, but you don't need a doctor. The way you move says your spine isn't damaged either," Izumi informs and I nod as I put my shirt back on. It's already getting dark outside. "Let's go upstairs" says Jay and I nod. A general "good night" or "sleep tight" is the response.

"I'm somehow not tired anymore" I sigh and sit down on the bed. "I told you to lie down," Jay remarks. "I just wanted to be with you. Be happy," I reply, offended. Jay grins "I am! I'm happy for every second with you". I look at him with satisfaction."I'm going to the bathroom," I say and disappear into the bathroom to wash myself.

Coming out of the bathroom, I see Jay sitting on the bed. I quickly realize that he is crying. So I quickly go to him and sit down next to him. I carefully put my arm around him "what's going on?" I ask softly. "It's just... because of Mingyu. He was like a father to me...or an uncle," he says through sobs. I gently pull him against me. Now I can feel his tears soaking my shirt but it doesn't bother me. Just like it didn't bother him back then.

I rarely see Jay cry and when he does I'm there for him. I'm not trying to stop him from crying. He should cry until he feels better. Crying helps, even if you don't think it. Sometimes the soul has to cry out. "It's okay to cry Jay. You can cry" I say and put my head on his.

We sit like this on the bed for ages. Our eyes almost close as we slowly disengage from our position. Jay looks at me. I look at him. "If you knew how much I love you..." Jay says softly."I can imagine it," I say just as quietly.

We both just want to sleep in each other's arms.When Jay was in the bathroom, he lay down next to me. Now that I'm lying in bed I'm getting more tired again. "Come here" says Jay and I put myself in his arms."Sleep well" I say with a smile and close my eyes."You too. And if you're not right here when I wake up...!" says Jay, which makes me smile."I really won't let go this time," I promise, putting my arm around him.

----

It feels good to wake up and know that you have nothing to do. We can do nothing all day if we want to. However, probably none of us can do it that well. I sit up and realize that Jay is no longer lying next to me. He was probably hungry and is already downstairs. I go to the bathroom and wash myself before changing my shirt. Luckily the closet here is full and I'm about the same height as Jay.

When I'm done I go downstairs. As expected, Jay is sitting there at the dining table. He doesn't eat, however, but works something on the laptop. I walk over to him and put my hands on his shoulders. "Good morning," I say, smiling slightly as he turns his head towards me. "What are you doing?" I ask interested and then sit down on the chair next to him. "Nothing important. Did you sleep well?". I nod."How's your back?" Jay asks worried. I shrug my shoulders slightly "it hurts a lot but it'll be fine"."Do you want to eat something? Mom made pancakes," Jay reports happily. I nod and get up with Jay to go to the kitchen. Since Jay hasn't eaten either, we'll do this together now.

"How long are we staying here?" I ask and bite off my food."Don't you like it?" he asks, looking at me. I shake my head "I really like it! i love the house. It is beautiful here. I also slept much better here than in the other bed," I admit. Jay smiles "I like that you like it here. My parents bought this house together. The first house they bought together. They were really young," he smiles."That's nice," I say dreamily. "I slept very well too, but probably only because you were with me," says Jay, smiling. I can't help but grin at you and lower my gaze as I blush. "You're so damn cute""Stop it" I say embarrassed and quickly eat my pancake. Jay watches me with a grin."Don't look at me like that" I say as I look up again and see that he's still looking at me. "I have to," he says, smiling. "Stop flirting with me" I say and look at him seriously. „Why?" he asks. I look at him a little desperately "because...because it's confusing!". 

I get up and take the empty plate to the kitchen.