Alhaitham X Kaveh - Love and Logic

10. An Elaboration On Form

Trigger warning: description of a panic attack
Please if you think there are any other TW that I should have put before other chapters, do comment, because sometimes I don't know if something could be a trigger

"How is he?" Alhaitham waited outside one of the huts in Gandharva Ville. He trusted Tighnari's abilities as a physician, but he couldn't get the sight of an arrow stuck in Kaveh out of his head. The ranger took off his bloody gloves before answering: "He got extremely lucky. Would love to meet the incompetent fool who shot my best friend instead of the target."
Cyno put his hand on his shoulder stating: "Wait until you see the target."
Tighnari nodded before turning back to Alhaitham: "He needs to rest, but he should be fine in a couple of weeks, physically."
Alhaitham's eyes narrowed, he waited for Tighnari to explain, but the ranger was already shouting orders to his subordinates. Cyno told him to find him the next morning to interrogate Kaveh's captors. They did not mention what Kaveh told them when he was rescued. Alhaitham nodded, knowing he will have to question Kaveh about it, but for now, it stays between him and the general. He entered the hut, seeing the blonde was asleep hugging Mehrak. The machine switched to a happy expression when noticing him, making giggly mechanic noises.
They are easier to understand than Kaveh Alhaitham thought to himself as he sat on the chair next to the bed. Kaveh's cheek was bruised, someone punched him. The woman they captured, was she his aunt? Why didn't he tell him? Or Tighnari? He sighed, looking back at his roommate, meeting his gaze. He stared at him, and his red eyes began to tear up. Alhaitham whispered his name, gently, like his words could shatter him if he wasn't careful enough. Kaveh sat up, hissing at the pain in his shoulder. He chuckled: "This could have been avoided if I stayed home."
Alhaitham felt anger boiling up in him.
"Or if you told me your aunt was a criminal." he snarled grabbing Kaveh's wrist. The blonde didn't fight, he flinched when Alhaitham moved, making him regret his action. Is he afraid of him?
Kaveh looked away as he said: "Until two days ago, I believed she was dead."
Alhaitham released his grip, but he didn't let go. His voice was calm as he called his name. He waited for the blonde to look at him but Kaveh refused to. He tried to blink away the tears as he felt Alhaitham grab his chin and turn his face to him. He still avoided eye contact, angry because Alhaitham was so stubborn.
"Kaveh..."
He pushed away his hand, yelling: "WHAT? What do you want? I know you don't believe me so WHAT HAITHAM? You brought me on this stupid mission without saying anything and now you are mad at me for not knowing who you were after?"
His body shook as he tried to turn away, sharp pain stopping him and making him groan. Alhaitham threw off his cape and kicked off his shoes, the sound making Kaveh look at him again. Before he could protest, the Scribe was lying next to him, gently pulling him into his hug. Kaveh wanted to struggle, but he had no energy for it and Alhaitham's warm body was too big of a temptation. He whispered: "You are weird," before he nuzzled into Alhaithams neck.
The other man chuckled, his free hand caressing the bruised cheek. Kaveh enjoyed the light touch, feeling how his body relaxed.
"I thought I lost you."
Alhaitham thought Kaveh was asleep when he whispered those words. He turned his head and faced Kaveh's teary eyes again. The blonde man tried to hide his face behind his hand, but the movement caused another shot of pain to course through his body. Alhaitham took his hand and let it rest on his stomach, covering it with his. Kaveh tried to shake his head, his voice muffled as his tears soaked Alhaitham's shirt: "You have to stop doing this."
"What? Cuddling? You seem to enjoy it." Alhaitham responded. He felt a weak punch before Kaveh groaned again.
"For a genius, you take a while to learn your lesson," the Scribe chuckled, hearing a bunch of muffled insults in return. Kaveh looked up at him, his voice cracked when he asked: "You... you are going to throw me out, aren't you?"
Alhaitham lightly squeezed him before answering: "No. It would be easier if you told me about your situation. This could have been avoided."
Kaveh scoffed: "It could also be avoided if I never moved in with you."
Alhaitham stayed silent, making Kaveh's stomach twist from anxiety. He could hear his voice, mocking him in his head. If he wasn't such a failure. As a scholar, as a friend, as a son...
Alhaitham felt Kaveh's hand squeeze the fabric of his shirt and the blonde's man loud and shallow breathing. He called his name, but his red eyes were wide open, staring right through him.
He is not here with me. The younger man hugged him, careful not to touch his wounded shoulder. Kaveh began to cry and pull him closer to him, sobbing into his chest.
I should have let that arrow hit me. I should have stopped when I had the chance. I don't want to hurt him. I can't hurt him.
Everything was spinning, the world became too much again and he couldn't stop it. He waited for the pain to start again, for all of the voices, all of his rage and hopelessness to try and escape from him. He remembered the last time he let them. The way her blood splashed when he cut her, how she screamed. Tears running down her mother's cheeks. The matra, smelling like the desert, telling them they found his father's body. He could still remember the sand in their hair and the cold eyes when they shattered his mother's heart in pieces.
Kaveh's whole body shook as he sobbed. Alhaitham understood some of the words but was not able to connect them into meaningful sentences. He knew enough about his senior's past, to deduce why he behaves the way he does, but Kaveh never mentioned his aunt neither did his parents. What did she do that made Kaveh so angry and reckless around her? It did not take a genius to make the connection to the note, but the Scribe knew there was something more, something darker that Kaveh was not telling him. Not yet. The blonde man in his arms calmed down, his breathing slow. Before he could stop himself he leaned closer and kiss the top of his head, Kaveh's golden hair tickling his nose. Kaveh held his breath for a second, not knowing how to react to the other man's gesture. He pulled away, enough to look Alhaitham in the eyes. There were dark circles under his eyes, but other than that, he was unharmed. Alhaitham smirked.
"What?" Kaveh asked, grateful the blush spreading through his cheeks was not as obvious as it would have been in the light.
"You look tired."
Kaveh stared at him in silence. He felt his cheeks flush with anger but before he could say anything, Alhaitham grabbed his chin, leaning in closer. His lips were soft when he pressed them to the blonde's. Kaveh tried to grasp at his thoughts, but all he could think about was the sweet taste of Alhaitham's lips.
Coffee, he must have drank coffee before he came here.
The architect grabbed the collar of Alhaitham's shirt and pulled him closer, deepening the kiss. He felt pain shoot through his shoulder again, making him break the kiss. It also made him realise what he just did. He kissed Alhaitham, his arrogant, self-centered roommate with an incredible body. That's hot important, he thought at the last part before his eyes locked with the scribe's. He couldn't read them, panicked that maybe its because he was angry.
"I... ... I am sor... sorry..." he stuttered, moving to the edge of the bed. He watched as Alhaitham's hand came to rest on his hip, before moving to his lower back and pulling him back into his hug.
"Why?" he asked as he rested his chin on top of Kaveh's head.
"Huh?"
"Why are you apologising to me?" his monotone voice had a calming effect on Kaveh. The blonde shrugged before replying: "I don't know. Because I kissed you..."
"Actually I kissed you first," Kaveh could feel the other man smile. They lay in silence, the sounds of the forest at night kept them company. After a few minutes, Alhaitham heard Kaveh ask: "Why?"
He pulled away and looked down at him.
"Why what?"
Kaveh rolled his eyes: "Why did you kiss me?"
Alhaitham stared at him before he laughed. Actually laughed. Kaveh just stared at him in disbelief before he rolled onto his back and pouted. He stated: "This is low even for you Haitham. If I could, I would turn away."
Alhaitham began to calm down and lay next to Kaveh, propping his head up to he could look at the blonde's trembling face. After Kaveh refused to look at him he spoke: "Oh Kaveh, why do you think I kissed you?"
Kaveh turned his head away as he mumbled: "Maybe you finally lost your mind from reading every book from House of Daena."
Alhaitham shook his head before turning Kaveh's head back to him, leaning close and whispering: "And you say I don't know how to read between the lines." Before Kaveh could retort, he kissed him again, this time it was rougher, he could feel Kaveh's body shake beneath him. He broke the kiss but stayed close, looking at Kaveh's red orbs. This time his whispers were raspy, his breathing shallow: "You getting any ideas or should I get a chalk and a board to explain this to you?"
Kaveh still stared at him, this time he seemed more said than confused. He began to cry, rolling to hide his face in Alhaitham's chest. The scribe had no choice but to let him cry himself out again. He heard his muffled voice again: "You don't hate me."
Not knowing if it was a statement or a question he replied: "True."
"You like me."
Alhaitham sighed before smiling again: "For a while now, yes."
Kaveh gave him a light punch, groaning: "Asshole."
He chuckled: "What for?"
Kaveh scoffed: "You could have told me."
Alhaitham did his best to hide his laugh.
"I kissed you and you asked me why."
Kaveh could feel him laughing. His face burned as he spoke into Alhaitham's chest: "Well I just got shot because of you."
Alhaitham stopped laughing and hugged him tighter. His voice was soft, Kaveh felt his breathing stop when he whispered close to his ear: "I am sorry. If there was a way I could stop it..."
Kaveh tried to shake his head: "You couldn't have. I... I will tell you. Just not now. I know I will have to come clean. I just..."
He was stopped by a gentle squeeze.
"Tomorrow. All you need to think about right now is getting some sleep. I promise to keep you safe."
Kaveh wished he could silence the little voice of doubt in the back of his head, he truly wanted to believe Alhaitham won't leave. But they all did. So why would his junior be any different?

Thank you for all the comments and likes <3
It really helped with my motivation when writing. I will do my best to get the next part posted a bit faster.
Also, less than ten days until we can pull for our traumatised architect <3
Who else has been saving their primos? XD