'i missed you, you know'
LIES
***
Why can't you just accept the fact that she loves you?
Instead of punishing her every time
You see her talking to another girl
Green with jealousy?
Good thing green is my favourite colour
Focusing on the negative instead of the positive
She only texted me two x's instead of three
Why didn't she send me three?
What did I do?
Is she tired of me already??
I will be forever alone--
She will abandon me.
Stopping myself from biting
Because I need my fingernails
To claw at my hair, my skin
I deserve to hurt
Streaks of red, my punishment
Expecting too much from someone
A human with their own problems
Too busy to worry about me
Or my irrational feelings
No single person should be responsible for my happiness
It's unrealistic and cruel to put so much pressure on someone who I care about
BUT DOESN'T CARE ABOUT YOU
Greed and denial my second and third biggest enemy
Because the first
Is me.
***
22.4.23
YOU ARE READING
bpd brain
Poetrya collection of unstructured poems expressing some experiences of bpd #5. borderline ~
