Love Within You

CH. 8

JAN 18TH
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It is currently 8:15 AM and Holden has just woken me up for a flight that leaves at 2 PM.

Two in the day, as in 6 hours from now.

Is he insane?

I was planning to sleep for another 2 hours or so but Holden had to pull this so now I can't fall asleep again, also since he's blasting music loud enough to bust my eardrums

"Shut up Holden!" I scream knowing he can barely hear me anyway, I grab my pillow and cover my ears with it as I stare at Holden who's singing to Sway by Michael Bublé, I have to admit, a good song though.

But definitely not for this time of day, I grab my other pillow and throw it at him.

He doesn't even move an inch and continues singing.

Stay with me, away with me
When marimbas start to play
Hold me close, make me sway
Like a ocean hugs the shore

And on going.

"Come on Brie, have fun" he laughs while I look at him, my eyes barely open.

"It's 8 AM Holden, all I'm planning to do right now is how I'm gonna murder you the second I stand up" I say.

"If I do" I add, standing up is the last thing on my list right now.

"Sway with me, Brie" he jokes, not a joke anymore when I go and suffocate him with my pillow.

'These boots are made for walkin' starts playing and I actually open my eyes now, I love this song.

The second I get ready to stand up he clicks the pause button on his speaker.

"Are you actually serious?" He shrugs.

"You said to stop" he replies.

"I fucking hate you Holden" I sneer and he chuckles. "Come downstairs I made breakfast" He says while leaving my room.

How? I look at the clock again and realize it's only been 10 minutes.

How does he have the time to do all that?

"Also, airport leaves at 2, so start getting ready" he shouts barely so that I can hear him.

"I know, and no" I yell back. We have 6 hours left and he wants me to get ready now, the airport is not even an hour away from here.

I am excited to see the twins though, I will say. I'm terrified of airplanes, I haven't been one since i was like what? Twelve?

Whatever, it's just the way my stomach feels like it's doing summersaults the second the plane starts moving.

And I haven't had anything happen in a plane before, so I don't know where this fear came from but I don't like sharing it with people.

That's probably why I always say no to going somewhere, but I couldn't with Holden.

I haven't seen the twins for a long long time and I've missed them so I know I have to go and see them and definitely for their birthday.

I walk over to to the bathroom and stare at myself for a few seconds to long.

Sometimes I look in the mirror and get disgusted with what I see, today is a day like that. I hate how I look on some days.

Others will say they'd do anything to look like me and while I appreciate it a lot I wish they knew what I look like in my eyes.

I haven't always been insecure and I haven't been as much, but it's moments where I stare at myself and notice imperfections.

And while those imperfections are perfect in other people they aren't on me, I don't know if I can explain it in words but I wish I could.