Carry that weight (Fruk)

13

"Hey! You actually came!"

"Yes, well, I did ask..."

"Right..."

Francis came in urgently, and I looked at him worried. He definitely was still thinking about everything. I did plan to tell him about my brother today, so maybe once he processed everything, I could. He seemed very on edge, and it worried me a bit.

I closed the door behind me, turning to look at him. Francis had this nervous expression, so I could only think to do one thing. "How about we sit down? Then you can talk to me about everything you want to talk about. I'll listen, I promise," I smiled. I walked over to my sofa, sat, and patted the cushion beside me. He fidgeted with his fingers, looking like he did not know what to say. However, he still went to take a seat beside me.

"Okay, before you start, I just want to apologise. I didn't mean for it to slip out like that, and I think that I am ready to move on so it doesn't affect our relationship-"

"WHY? WHY NOW?!"

Here we go...

"I AM MARRIED TO YOUR BROTHER...I mean...How? Since when? Why?"

I could tell it was starting to get to him, and I felt terrible. He looked sadder than anything. "Okay...I know...I didn't mean for it to come out this way...I was planning on never telling you, but it happened, and I can't take it back...and honestly..."

I paused for a minute to think about it. He was freaking out, and well, I only felt bad. I didn't worry that he might tell my brother, and I don't think I actually regret it. "I don't regret it...It was time for me to tell you. However, I know I need to move on, and I will. I don't want us to be distant, but if we have to, then so be it. I have loved you for a long time since we were in high school. I loved you through college, through your relationship with my brother, and till now. I know you don't feel the same way, and I accept that...I only regret telling you this way...it was long overdue..."

He looked at me with a still expression. His head was tilted, then...he smiled.

Then...laughed.

"Huh? Why are you laughing?"

"Pfft...I have never seen you like this; it's a little funny..."

My eyes widened at him, and I felt my face getting hot. "I take it back...I hate you...you are the worst person ever," I hissed. I crossed my arms, turning away from him, and all I could hear was his infuriating laugh. "Aww, don't turn away from me...please," he begged. He sounded so cute, and I couldn't help but get over myself.

He placed a hand on my shoulder, and I turned to look at him. The sensation of his hand against my shoulder made me wish my shirt didn't cover my skin. I could only imagine what it felt like. He was very close to me for once and looked serious. His hand traced down my arm, and I widened my eyes. We were close...too close.

My arms were still crossed, and he reached his other hand onto the sofa to support himself as he leaned in. "Fran...ci.."

I kept my eyes wide as he first kissed me. I had so many confusing thoughts running through my head, but they were soon squished as I felt myself kissing him back. I knew what I was doing was wrong, but I kissed him without thinking.

He separated from me suddenly, and I looked at him, horrified. "Oh my, I am so sorry; I don't know what got over me! I....oh my god..." Francis looked horrified; he didn't know what else to say.

"I..."

"SHUT UP! DON'T SAY ANYTHING!"

Francis pushed my head back aggressively against the sofa, and I made a muffled grunt at the impact. WHAT THE HELL?! First, he kisses me, then beats me?!

"I am so sorry! I don't know what got into me...oh no...your brother! I swear, this isn't like me; I didn't mean to do that!"

In any other situation...in the situation where I didn't have feelings for him, I would be a bit upset that he cheated on my brother. However, my brother had already cheated, and I did have feelings for him, so I didn't care. However, he didn't know that, so he did care. To him, he was breaking their marriage vows.

"Hey, it's okay...I won't tell my brother...it was an accident...you bumped into me..." I lied. His eyes widened at what I said, and I laughed a little. It was the only thing I could think of to say. He had moved away from me, and I wish he didn't. I would be lying if I said I never wanted to kiss him again. I wanted to...badly.

Kissing him was like having a piece of cake that was so good, I could eat more...but I wasn't allowed to have any more. My heart was still racing, and I was sure my face was still red. "We don't have to talk about it; it might be for the best," I laughed. He nodded in agreement and stood up quickly. I followed his lead, and we began to face each other silently.

This feeling...

It felt like this overwhelming tension.

"I should go..." he spoke. I nodded in agreement, and we still stared at each other. "Yeah, I can...see you out," I suggested. He nodded in acceptance, slowly backing toward the door. This was fine; this was a one-time thing. He turned around, placing his hand on the doorknob, and I could only stare. "Francis."

"YES!?...Ah...Yes?"

His head shot toward me, and he looked eager. "I will see you around..." I explained. His face was red, and he nodded. "Of course! We have that thing...coming up..."

"Ah...yes...THAT thing...if you want, we could always...see each other again. I still want to be friends...and well, we hardly see each other...it would be nice," I suggest. What the hell was I doing? I am a stupid twat!

"Oh! I wouldn't ask for anything else...I would love to see you again...just...let me know..." he laughed. I nodded at him, walking closer. I was going to open the door for him since it seemed he had forgotten how a doorknob works.

I reached over him, leaning in to open the door knob.

WHAT WAS I DOING?

I opened the door, looking at his reddened face. "Right, you should be off now..." I spoke. He nodded at me, and I nodded back. My body felt hot. I wanted to pull him inside and kiss him again. "See you around..." he spoke. I nodded, smiling, and he placed a hand on my shoulder, giving a thumbs up. He held onto my shoulder firmly, but it didn't bother me. I had a racing head and heart that wasn't satisfied.

Once he left, I closed the door, dumbfounded. Then, it finally hit me.

"FUCK!... I forgot to tell him about Alistair..."