Mysterium in the Ring

Chapter 26: Never Felt So Alone

"What's wrong?" Dominik looks at me with worry evident in his eyes.

"Leave me alone," I say struggling to walk around him.

"Zoe, what's going on?" he asks again not letting me off the hook so easily.

"Dominik, leave me alone," I say mimicking the way he just spoke to me.

"Zoe, no." He says mimicking me back.

This has become a war of who's more immature.

I look at him with a serious look.

"I don't want to talk about it. Especially not to you."

"Ouch," he puts his hand on his chest like he got hurt.

"Oh, please," I roll my eyes. I don't have time to deal with this right now, I am so upset with everything and everyone. I don't want to say something that I may regret later, so I think it's best if I go anyways.

I walk around him with irritation on my face. He calls for me but I continue walking a couple more feet before something shiny in a bush catches my eye.

I stop walking and focus on the light a bit more.

"Unbelievable!" I exclaim before turning back around to Dominik. "I can't even catch a break without having cameras shoved in my face!" I feel my face get hot, and my eyes start to water. I can't cry now I have cameras on me.

Pushing back my tears I turn back to the cameras, "Get out of my face before I shove your cameras into the ground so hard you go down with it." I sneer before walking off praying no one followed me. When I think I am far enough I let the tears spill over.

My dad didn't show.

I really was dumb enough to believe him and trust him to actually be there.

What a joke I am.

I continue walking till I make it to my block. I don't bother looking at people when I pass them. I just want to be in my room by myself away from everyone- like it has always been. Eventually, I pass a kid who looks up at me with recognition in his eyes.

"That's Zoe! It's Zoe!" the little boy jumps when he sees me.

Normally I would stop and take pictures with him, but right now I am in no condition to take pictures with anyone. All I do is smile weakly at him and continue my walk.

I can see my building now, and that makes me walk a bit faster. Walking onto the steps of my hotel- I walk in quickly heading straight for the elevator.

Pushing the button that symbolizes my floor number, I wait for the door to open.

When the doors open I walk over to my room number, the tears are still falling, but they are falling slowly.

As soon as the door opens I shut it behind me and fall to the ground crying. I let it all out.

Everything that I have been feeling since the moment I woke up.

I felt anxiety this morning, and then the eagerness while waiting at the restaurant. My heart-dropping to my feet when I read the text, I felt myself get angry at my father; but then that all subsided and it went to hurt. On the way back to my place I felt cautious and aware, but obviously not aware enough to notice cameras on me. I felt cornered and vulnerable at that moment.

All of those feelings leading up to this moment are coming out, and it's not pretty.

I cry so hard that I start gasping for air, and every time I start to stop crying- I make myself cry more. I don't know why I keep doing this to myself, but crying feels better than being alone in silence right now.