The Christmas Party

We'll Be Home For Christmas

"Hi Mom," I said, answering the FaceTime call.

"Why do you never call your mother?" she asked in her thick  Korean accent. I opened my mouth to protest this unjust treatment, but my mom just barked on. "You know who calls me?" I was going to answer 'my sister' but my Mom didn't give me enough time. "Your friend, Taehyung! He calls me more than you do. Maybe should I adopt him as my son instead since he cares about your dear mother more than you do."

I glared at Taehyung. He shrugged like he was supposed to talk to someone else.

"Mom, I've been busy this week, I'm sorry."

"Sure that's what I hear every week. You know Taehyung tells me everything you're up to since you refuse to call me."

"Mom I don't refuse to call you."

"You know I love you and I miss you! You live so far now I hardly ever see you!"

"Mom, I only live three hours away."

"You might as well live across the country!"

"Oh my God."

"So since I have to get all of my information from Taehyung I thought I would just call you myself and we can catch up. I also need to get a final headcount for Christmas. Taehyung and your girlfriend, right? Anyone else?"

"My girlfriend?" I asked, confused.

"I thought you and Jennie were an item?"

"Jennie? A what?"

"I thought you two were dating."

"No, Mom, it's just fake for my holiday party. I told you this. Who told you we were actually dating?"

"From what I've heard it's not fake." I glared at Taehyung again who threw his hands up in surrender. "I don't know how many times I have to tell you I want to know about your dating life. Taehyung even told me about his date last night! You didn't tell me about your date with Jennie. Why do I have to drag these things out of you?"

"Oh my God mother! It wasn't a date; we're not dating-we're just friends. Jennie is pretending to be my girlfriend."

"Listen, honey, you don't have to be embarrassed. You know I approve, even if you won't tell your own mother about your dating life. Jennie's wonderful. So pretty and smart and successful. You could do much worse; you have done much worse."

I hit Taehyung. "I don't know what Taehyung has been telling you but he's lying. Jennie isn't my girlfriend."

"Well why not? You've been single for so long and Jennie's a wonderful woman! And you think she's hot. What else do you need?"

My face burned bright red. "Mother! I never said that!" I tried to tell her with my eyes to shut up, but she didn't seem to be getting the hint.

"Yes you did! Taehyung, didn't she say that Jennie was hot?"

"Mom! Jennie is in the room. She can hear you!"

I jumped off the couch and walked onto the balcony to finish the phone call, firmly closing the door behind me. I didn't care that it was snowing and I was freezing and didn't have any shoes on; I would not allow my mother to embarrass me anymore.

"Mom! I told you to never repeat what I told you about Jennie!"

"Sorry honey, your mother forgets these things. I still think you should tell her though, it's a nice compliment for a girl to hear, especially from such a beautiful young woman like yourself."

"She heard you!"

"So what's the problem?"

"The problem is she heard you, Mother! Now she knows that I said that."