Autumn Burn

Chapter 7

I realized I skipped dinner when I woke up way too early in the morning with a grumbling stomach. The sun didn't rise fully yet, the sky still colored in orange and pink. And I realized I was sleeping in my clothes. I sighed with annoyance at myself and changed into a tight sports leggings and a crop top and made my way down the stairs into the kitchen. At least I tried to, because I was about half the way down when I slipped and more or less fell the second half of it down.
"Fuck." I exclaimed as pain shot through my ass. I landed on it with the full force of the fall.
"I hate stairs." I grumbled and picked myself up. Now angry with myself I stamped into the kitchen. Only to find muffins on the counter. At least one good thing. Grabbing a plate, I put a few of them on it and made my way back to my room, being extra careful on the stairs.
I found Nyx in my room.
"Why are you up already?" I asked as I plunged down next to him on my bed, shoving one muffin in my mouth. Nyx didn't answer at first, his look grim. He was angry.
"You made a bargain with him?" I put the plate down and finished chewing. So that was wrong.
"It was the only way to make sure that he would not back out on us. Now he doesn't have a choice."
"Yes, you don't have either!" I flinched as he suddently screamed.
"Don't you understand? You have to accept the bond now!"
"I don't have to!" I said, furrowing my eyebrows. I hated it when he screamed at me, having no patience and not thinking.
"You have no idea what that bargain included."
"I just know that you will fuck with the enemie now!" Oh wow. I laughed out, no joy in my voice.
"First of all, Eris may be an asshole, but he is not our enemie. His father is and you know it." Nyx grunted, rolling his eyes at me. I hated it when he was like that. And my temper didn't like it either.
"And second, I can fuck with whoever I want and that's none of your business." Of course I wouldn't sleep with Eris but I was so angry at him for judging me that I just said it. Because I was right, it wasn't his business.
"It is my business if you want to fuck a male who will destroy you. You are part of my court and my responsibility. I am the future High Lord and that's why it is my business."
"Oh, fuck off." I said, now totally annoyed.
"Excuse me?" he growled, power rippling from him. But I didn't back off.
"Yes, you better excuse yourself!" I said, standing up.
"You come here into my room, judging me for helping your court and sacrificising something for the safety of your world! I could've go back to my own but instead I chose to stay and help because I could and now your world has a chance. And what's the price? I have to spend time with a male I don't like and that has done terrible things. But I am doing that for your world, for your court! And you may be the future High Lord but you are not yet and I am not your responsibility, I never was!" He grew angrier with every word, but I didn't care. People always thought they had a right to choose for me and questioning my own decisions, never trusting or believing in my ability of making my own choices. I was even used to Nyx making decisions for me, I could live with that to a certain point because he was a male Illyrian and he just wanted to protect me. But right now ... he didn't even ask about anything. He didn't understand. And he didn't try to understand at all.
"So don't you dare judging me for something you have no clue about, you know nothing about the bargain I made and you didn't even bother to ask, rather jumping in conclusions and stating me as a traitor for that bargain even though you know Mor is a dear friend of mine and I know exacly what he did." I was breathing heavily and my throat hurted from all the screaming. Nyx only stared at me, pure magic shining in his eyes. He was about to freak out, his magic lashing out.
"And now get out!" I gritted through my teeth, pointing to the door. He didn't move.
"You will not-"he started.
"Get. The Fuck. Out!" I knew I wasn't being fair, instead of staying calm and explaining everything to him, I just let myself being carried away from the anger. Maybe it was the fact that I indeed was now more or less chained to Eris or the fact that I had a shitty morning and I was hungry. I didn't know but I was angry that he wouldn't try to understand. The problem with Nyx was, it was no use of trying to explain something to him when he thought he was right and angry at the same time. He wasn't listening in this state. And usually I would have just let him be, but right now ... I was just in rage, feeling trapped in the bargain with the male who hurt one of my best friends and Nyx wasn't helping. I didn't want gratitude or something like that. I just wanted him to hold me for a second and tell me that everything would be alright. A silly wish, but it didn't change that I wanted it. Now I just wanted him to get out of my sight.
"Out." I repeated.
"Before I scream for someone who gets you out." I just needed to scream loud enough for one of the others to hear me. Neither Cassian nor Azriel would ask questions, they would just get Nyx out of my room. And after Nyx would've calmed down I could talk with him again. But until then I didn't stand to see and fight with him.
Nyx growled, but got up from my bed, stumping out of the door and slamming it behind him shut. I flinched at the loud bang. The urge to scream rose in me and I trew myself on the bed, pressed my face into a thick pillow and screamed as loud as I could. Again. And again.
Breathing heavily, I lifted my face and closed my eyes.
What a shitty morning.