Autumn Burn

Chapter 10

It took me a while to realize that we had arrived since I had kept my eyes closed. I still didn't't open them and just took a deep breath, trying to calm my racing heart.

Birds chirped somewhere near and I could hear leaves rustling in the wind and a cool breeze crept up my thin shirt. I hadn't dressed to be outside in the autumn, my shirt didn't even cover my belly button and the leggings weren't made out of thick fabric either.

„What did he do?" I almost flinched upon hearing Eris' voice, his chest vibrating with every word he said. I forgot that my back was pressed against him and the same moment I realized that, I suddenly was aware of my fingers again, scrunching up his pants in between them. I forced them to open and found them shaking. I also now started to feel Eris' arm around my body again. How could I forget? Were I really so overwhelmed with my emotions that I totally forgot that Eris was even there? 

I could feel Eris' breathing. His chest rising and falling and my body went with his. I could feel all his movements and he lowered his head until his breath hit my throat and a shiver went down my spine. But I wasn't uncomfortable and that was exactly what made me feel uncomfortable. I shouldn't feel that way, no matter what happened with Nyx.

Eris didn't say a word and I remembered that he had said something before. A question. What did he do?

„Nothing." The word came out as a whisper, a clear lie and I knew he knew. His arm pressed down on me, pushing me even harder against him and I hated myself for the way it made me feel. I hated that I liked it.

„What did he do?" His voice almost brought me to my knees, deep and rich. The question was just a mumble but since his lips were so close to my ear, I felt each word. My eyes were still closed and I wanted ... I wanted ... I didn't know or I didn't want to know. But I knew what I should want.

Ripping my eyes open, I freed myself out of his embrace, taking a long step away from him with the words, sharp like a knife:

„I don't want to talk about it!" Eris grabbed my wrist, but since my back was still facing him, I underestimated the force with which he held me and when I tried to take another step away from him, I felt like I'd got caught in something. But I had stepped away with enough force that my body was overwhelmed. I was pulled back, my feet tripped over themselves and then I felt myself falling. Instead of catching me, like I suspected, Eris only raised my arm higher and because his hand didn't lose his grip, I was able to restore my balance and avoided falling on my ass. Stumbling a little, I finally came to a halt, the adrenaline pumping through my body resulted in me breathing hard.

„Are you crazy?" I snapped at him. I knew I wasn't fair, it wasn't his fault that I stumbled that hard but I didn't care about fairness right now. I wanted to lose some frustration and there he was.

„What's wrong with you?!" Eris' caramel eyes were cast in shadows, his jaw set tight and suddenly he looked more animalistic than I had ever seen him.

„What did he do to you?" He repeated, his voice having the edge of the deadly calm that many High Fae possessed. His fingers were still wrapped around the wrist of my right hand  and I stared at them, contemplating snatching my wrist out of his grasp. As if he read my mind, his fingers tightened around my skin. It didn't hurt, but it was clear that he didn't want to let me go. I knew I could make him. Yet, I didn't.

I was about to tell him to mind his own fucking business, but I had a feeling he wouldn't let it go. And since I was completely at his mercy right now, since I had no interest in going back to the Night Court, I just knew he wouldn't drop the topic. The same moment I realized that, another idea to solve this problem entered my mind. A very foolish, very idiotic idea. But I couldn't care less right now. I just didn't want to think about any of this anymore, no matter the price.