Oakley [ON HOLD]

19

I slumped down in my seat as the bell went off, Elijah sitting beside me.

I pulled out my book from my back pocket and opened it, dipping my head and trying to focus on the words.

But of course my thoughts strayed to her once again.

Elijah had pulled me away from her closed door yesterday after a while, but all I wanted was to see her again and apologize.

"I have a note, Sir"

My head snapped up at her voice and there she was. Standing at the desk and handing a note in for her absence. Her hair was once again down, with her usual uniform and the large sling on her left arm cradling it to her chest.

Handing the note in and exchanging a few more words, my eyes tracked her movements as she slightly turned and headed for her seat. Placing her books on the desk she sat down and pushed her curls behind her ears, opening a notebook.

Mr. Whittaker's voice snapped me from my daze as he starting talking. But of course my eyes drew back to her. Strands repeatedly unhooked from behind her ears, falling in front of her eyes, a couple times she automatically tried to lift her left arm to pull the curls back but almost winced in pain.

My fingers traced against the ribbon tied around my wrist, my leg bouncing up and down at the need to go help pull the strands back.

Her hand suddenly raised slightly as the teachers head turned to her.

"May I use the washroom?" Oakley murmured as he slightly nodded.

She stood from her seat and carefully walked around the other seats, not glancing in my direction.

I immediately pushed myself from my chair as soon as she disappeared into the hallway and out of my view.

A hand tightly wrapped around my shoulder.

"Abel" Elijah murmured warningly.

My jaw clenched as I quickly raised my hand.

"May I use the washroom" I sighed out not even waiting for the Mr. Whitaker to acknowledge me.

His eyes squinted slightly before he nods and motions me out.

I quickly left the room, entering the empty hallway and walked towards the closest set of washrooms.

Finally finding them I stood beside the entrance quietly, listing to see if anyone was in there. Not hearing anything I poked my head past the opening, seeing Oakley's back turned to the entrance as her right arm was raised to her hair with a clip in hand and her fingers trying to grab a few strands to pull back.

Quietly I stepped into the washrooms, walking toward her as she continued her efforts. I stopped a little ways away from her, my hand automatically raising to brush my fingers against her hand. Her body tensed as I gently took the clip from her fingers, I could see her eyes slightly look toward the large mirror and see me.

I stepped slightly closer, wishing that she'd just let me hold her and apologize, but for now I'll just help. My arms raised as my fingers went close to her temples, skimming across her warm skin as I dragged my fingers, loosely pulling back some strands that often fall in front of her eyes.

Feeling in a daze from the feeling of her being close again, her beautiful hair literally in my fingertips, I once again get to surround myself with her cinnamon smell. I open and close the small clip around the strands pulled back as I clear my throat and take a small step back.

Oakley shifts and turns to face me. Her hazel eyes meet mine and I almost melt getting to be this close to her again. My arm lifts without me thinking, my palm cupping her jaw. Her right hand wraps around my wrist lightly as she clamps her eyes shut looking in pain as I step closer.

"Abel.." she murmurs.

"Please.. just let me apologize-"

"I'm so sorry, I'm so fucking sorry Oakley. I shouldn't have said those things and yelled. Just please, talk to me, let me help you, hold you" I whisper out pleadingly as my other palm finds her jaw, trying to get her to just look at me again.

"It's not that-"she murmurs.

"We're not good for each other, you'll end up getting hurt" she whispers as she takes a step back, my hands falling from her skin, the warmth disappearing.

Her eyes focus on the floor as I plead her to just look at me again, to just explain. If it's not about that then what's this about? Why is she trying to push me away?

"Don't do this. Please don't do this Oakley. Just let me in and help me understand" I say taking a step toward her as she takes one back, a small tear falling from her eye and running down her cheek.

"I'm sorry" she whispers as she swiftly wipes the tear from her skin and rushes past me, her hand slightly brushing against mine as she passes, and before I can wrap my fingers around it and pull her back to me, she's already gone.

I sway slightly on my feet, confused and hazy.

My back hits the wall as I sink down, my elbows resting against my knees and diving my hands into my hair.

I just don't understand, if it's not about what I said in the hospital then what's it about? Why does she think I'll end up getting hurt?

I quickly push up from my position, shaking my thoughts away, now determined, and head away from the washrooms. I need to find out what could possibly be the problem, what her distancing herself is about and why she thinks I'll end up hurt.

I can't lose her.

I've already lost someone in a way I could have prevented. I won't lose her too. I need her, her small laughs and nervous blushes, her salted hot chocolates and cinnamon-ey smell, I'm just not willing to let that go so easily.