SCARS

NADINE POV

Or...it was. Yes, it damn was.Because as soon as that brown - disheveled haired head came out, and I saw the man who literally lived in an all-black wardrobe, I knew the universe had conspired to make me feel so special that I would want to inject a syringe full of muscle relaxants into myself.I tried to walk back... to save myself from the horror, but just like my luck, my lower limbs didn't love me enough. My legs felt like ice, and my attempts to run only made me jerk back. Jan put his hand firmly upon my lower back to save me from the total business-unfriendly fall. I watched in horror as that pair of dark blue eyes bore into my soul as he walked towards us.

Kill me. Dear heart, can you please lend me a cardiac arrest?

"I am Ledger...Ledger Louis Catalano," he said, extending his hand towards me.

" He is the boss," I said, pointing towards Jan. That was probably the most stupid reply I could frame.

"I am sorry. The lady looked like she loved to exercise control over her own life...metaphorically of course."

That hit me like an iceberg. My last words to him rang like a loud, irritating alarm in my head.'I can't have a man who lives in a sea of uncertainty as my beloved. I love to have control over my own life.'

"That she does. I love her for it." Jan replied, chuckling. Ledger's features stiffened.

'Jan! Please! Don't try to be funny!' I begged inwardly.

"C'mon, MJ, don't look horrified. You know, I mean. good. " he said shooting me a look that clearly said - please smile.

"I know, Peter," I replied almost reflexively. 

"Peter... Peter Parker?" Ledger asked raising an eyebrow."It's endearing, right? Let's go inside." Jan replied, holding my hand as he tried to guide my frozen feet inside.

As our eyes broke from the intense contact, my self-preservation features kicked in.'Your heart may be in tachycardia mode. But that's because you are shocked at your own bad luck. Your legs are frozen because you know you have to face it. You are strong. You are boss-bitch.

'STOP THAT.'Realistically, I want to cry but I won't because he never deserved my tears."I have heard some call their beloved names that have found their inspiration in food items like cupcakes."

" Mr. Catalano, priorities change, and people can't call a literal Greek god a cupcake, right? Peter Parker befits him." I said snapping my fingers up in the air like I wanted his attention although I was sure I was already having enough of it.

Jan's face broke into a smile as he mouthed," Welcome back, alert Nadine."

I smiled back too although my core felt like it had just been burnt again.

I entered the conference room and walked straight to the chair next to Jan's.

As I settled and logged into the system, Ledger occupied the seat opposite to mine. Of course, he had to be the captain.

Seven years ago, his volleyball...

Didn't matter.

" Arent employee-employer relationships out of the rule book of your hospital?" Ledger asked with an edge to his voice.

Well... I had seen that one coming but not that early.

Before Jan could reply, I looked Ledger in the eye and said, " They are allowed until you are certain and loyal and stick to the one that you claim to love."

Hurt washed over his face for a second before it was replaced with a stoic expression.

I wasn't the kind who sought revenge but I knew how to shut the mouth of the man who dodged silly questions at me.

For the rest of the meeting, Ledger refused to speak except for a few affirmative words. His eyes stayed fixed on the screen though I knew he wasn't listening just like I wasn't.

Maybe he wanted to revert the situation too. Maybe he wished he was a sailor instead of a volleyball player. Maybe he wished he could stop this meeting right away and narrate our entire history to everyone in the room.

I would never know and I would never ask.

For the last time, I had asked him about the content he had in his mind, he had replied" I thought you had left me. I was confused...I beg you...I am sorry."

Beg me. My foot!

He broke us because of his damn confusion.

Thanks to him, Steph walked into my house that night and narrated to me a brief account of their intimacy in detail along with his promise of leaving me that she had voice recorded as I stood there looking like a total fool.

The meeting ended in a haze and Ledger left first followed by his team, Jan, and me.

I had no desire to escort him out but a woman who fights for herself doesn't run away. 

Just like Brave never did.

Thanks, Disney! You inspire me.