To love a Soldier

Like a wrecking ball

Gerrie stood frozen in front of the tv, watching the news report, who kept replaying the explosion outside of Vought Towers.

As much as the headlines kept flashing the news, Gerrie just refused to believe it. Maeve and Soldier Boy dead, Homelander still smugly alive.

Reports kept saying that Maeve had died trying to save Homelander from a terrorist attack. No one  mentioned Butcher and his group. Apparently Starlight had helped evacuate the people from the tower, otherwise the death toll would have been worse. How could it be worse? Ben.

She couldn't believe it. No she wouldn't believe it. There was no body recovered. There was talk of both Ben and Maeve having been incinerated in the blast.  The man had nuclear waste poured down his throat. If that didn't melt him, how was a blast shooting out of him, going to kill him.

No, there must have been something else. She needed to get back to the City, back to her place. Maybe he was there waiting for her.

He can't be dead. She would be able to feel if he was dead right? Though right now all she could feel was numb.

She needed a plan. A list. She always loved her lists. Right let's see.
1 Pack up,
2 Check out and go back to the City.
3 See if she could get home as parts if the City were closed for cleanup and being tested for radiation.
4 Find Ben.

Maybe he faked his death? Maybe to get away from the Team, who obviously betrayed him, had to go into hiding. Maybe nothing though. Maybe he ran off with those two maids, or was just somewhere wetting his dick with some other convenient hole.

Too many thoughts ran through her mind. He can't be gone.

Gerrie stood up, quickly began packing her stuff.

"Shit phone charger! " She said to herself. She grabbed it off the side of the bed, stuffed it in her bag, and quickly left the room. She needed to get to Ben.

Checking out the room, she all but ran to her car.

Traffic back into the City was a breeze as most people were trying to leave it. She had, had to do several side road reroutes though  because of the closed off-roads, but finally had made it back to her apartment.

Running up the stairs, as the electricity was still out, Gerrie ran to her door, quickly unlocked and entered.

"Ben?" Gerrie shouted out.

"Ben? Are you here?" Gerrie called out repeatedly as she checked each room. She even pulled aside the shower curtain hoping to find him behind it.

Nothing.

"Ben!" Gerrie cried out once more, the realization hitting her. Not only was Soldier Boy dead, but so was Ben. If he was alive he would have been here, or left her a note. But there was nothing.

Just the inaudible sound of Gerrie's heart breaking as she fall to the floor. Silent screams of agony erupting from within. Eventually tears would flow, and not stop as her body shook with the violent wracking of her chest.

Hours later, Gerrie dragged herself to the couch, the whisky bottle still there. She gulped down the remains, hoping that the alcohol would make her pass out for awhile, allow her to escape the all consuming grief. Laying down on the floor, the couch and bed holding too many memories, Gerrie faded into sweet unconsciousness.