Little Mischiefs [Inglorious Bastards/Black Anthology | HP Fanfic]

~ IB: Roman: Professional Quidditch Player, Best Friend, Wingman...ish

2005

Being a father was the last thing that Theodore thought he would be. When he was still in Hogwarts, the only thing in his mind was Carina, classes, homework, studies, reading, Roman, survival, and Carina – yes, Carina has always been the first and last thing in his mind even when they were still pubescent teens who were surviving the biggest horror house in Scotland, which was their school. But now, being a father was the greatest thing Theodore ever experienced in his life, and his children were his greatest treasures… they were his and Carina’s legacy.

Even though Harry and Ginny said that all parents would see their kids as perfect, he knew that his children were. No questions about it. Romulus, Sofia, and Viktor were more than perfect… but sometimes he just wished that they would give him and Carina a break and stop interrupting them before they could even have sex.

Loud cries were heard from the nursery, Carina and Theodore broke their deep and passionate kiss with a groan. 

“I swear, they are doing this on purpose,” Carina got off of him and went to put on her underwear again before heading to the nursery. 

“I’ll help you with the kids once I’m done, fixing this,” Theodore got up from their bed to go to the bathroom.

“Sorry,” Carina kissed him.

“It’s not anyone’s fault.”

After one last kiss, Carina went to the nursery to answer the cries of their children while Theodore went to the bathroom to fix his little “problem”, because he was not going to the nursery with an erection. 

~*~

“When was the last time you and Morgan had sex?”

Carina’s question slightly caught Roman off guard, usually he would be the one open to the idea of talking about their sex lives and would be the one to start the conversation about it, Carina would simply just join in on the conversation but still keep explicit details to herself, while Theodore (who was currently in the reserve to deal with some newly transported dragons) was more private about what happens in the bedroom. 

“Last night, why?” Roman answered.

“Oh.”

Roman raised a brow, he observed Carina for a moment to figure out where the sudden question came from, and just by seeing how she was dressed – sweat pants, a jumper, fluffy-puppy slippers, her hair tied up to a messy bun, and was drinking soup out of the “Sexy Mama” mug he bought her, he knew that there was something bothering her.

“How about you, when was the last time you and Theodore had sex?” 

Carina thought for a moment. “Does a hand-job count?”

“No.”

“Then four months ago.”

“YOU HAVEN’T HAD SEX FOR FOUR MONTHS?!”

“SHH!” Carina slapped him on the shoulder over and over until he stopped overreacting. And just as Carina expected, Romulus, Sofia, and Viktor got up from their little corner to see what was going on. 

“Mummy?” Viktor fidgeted while wondering why their mother was punching their uncle Roman.

“This is nothing, sweetheart, Uncle Roman was just… well, he’s overreacting – go back and play, nothing’s wrong,” Carina ushered her children back to their little playpen on the corner. Once they were settled and distracted with the gifts that Roman bought them, she returned to the counter where she and Roman were. “Would you not scream for everyone to hear?! There are minors here!”