AVATAR one shots :)

Neteyam - I just want to be with you

If I needed to be honest right now, I would say I don't know what I'm doing, at all. I don't know where to go now that my family and I have left the forest. Now that I do not have all these responsibilities to become the next Olo'eyktan, I do not know where I want to go or what I want to be.

Now I have the choice, the choice to be whoever I want to be.

I still want to be a warrior. I want to protect the clan, protect the ones I love. I know my father would be proud of me if I did... I know he wants me to look out for my baby brother. Lo'ak doesn't seem to like that very much though. He does not want to be seen as a little kid anymore.

I think he wants to impress others, or maybe just prove that he can also be a great warrior.

Lately he has been spending a lot of time with you. I teased him a little bit about it, despite the growing jealousy in my heart. He pushed me away when I asked him about you, telling me that he did not saw you like this. From what I understood, you were really good at giving advice and he really needed help with girls apparently. In my opinion, he was doing fine, he had Tsireya looking at him with heart eyes and you were never leaving his side.

I never liked feeling jealous or envious of what others had. It made me act on feelings when I needed to stay calm and rational. I just could not understand why you would not even look at me.

Was i doing something wrong?

It's almost like you would not even let me approach you. Every time I come up to you, you find a way to dodge me and leave. Even today when I attempted to talk to you, you reacted the same as always.

"Hey.. I was wondering if you knew where Lo'ak is?" I quietly asked as to not scare you. I approach you as you stood from where you were sitting and looked over to me. You were making a bracelet with shells you probably found while you were with Kiri earlier.

"I don't know." You coldly responded as you started to walk away. I frowned in defeat since even when I asked you about my baby brother you didn't seem interested. "He's probably with Tsireya." You continued as I turned to watch you walk away.

"Thanks..." I sighed before sitting down in the sand. I looked out the horizon, thinking that I could maybe think of a way to stop thinking about you. You obviously did not care about anything to do about me, I should not try so hard.

Lo'ak was one lucky guy to have all of your attention.

Now that I was not destined to be Olo'eyktan anymore, I could choose whoever I wanted to be with. I did not have to choose someone for their healing skills. I could choose for love.

But I seemed to be invisible to others.

Or at least when it came to you, I was.

It's not like I really knew you, we never had an actual conversation but there was something about you.

You're sweet with everyone. I saw you joke around with Lo'ak, you're funny. You are there to help take care of Tuk when Kiri has to watch after her. You're respectful to both my parents. You're always happy to have a conversation with every single person in my family, but me.

Maybe I was weird? I'm not mean, am I? Is it my face? Maybe I am ugly?

Could that be it? Could it be you thought I was not attractive enough to talk to? No, you wouldn't be that superficial, right? If it is not, then maybe you found me boring?

I know that Lo'ak is more adventurous than me, he likes to get in trouble. Maybe you were more into bad boys? Should I start acting out to possibly get your attention?

What am I thinking?

I loudly sighed as I moved my hand to rub my face. I should not need to act as someone else to get someone's attention. I'm an idiot.