I can taste salt water
And if I blink again
You'll be sinking in
So we'll learn to swim in the oceans you made
I'll hold ya and you'll think of him
And pretty soon you'll be floating away
And I'll hold on to the words you spoke of
Anchored down in the throat, love
And I'm captain of this sinking boat now
With just one armband to carry me home
When salted tears won't dry
I'll wipe my shirtsleeves
Under your eyes
These hearts will be flooded tonight
I'll wipe my shirtsleeves
Under your eyes
Your eyes [5x]
I still taste salt water
On my lips from your kiss, bitterness
And I'll drown within the oceans you made
And I hate to love you, these cuffs are covered in your make up
I'll never trust you again
You can just be a friend
And I'll hold on to the words you spoke of
Anchored down in the throat, love
And I'm captain of this sinking boat now
With just one armband to carry me home
When salted tears won't dry
I'll wipe my shirtsleeves
Under your eyes
These hearts will be flooded tonight
I'll wipe my shirtsleeves
Under your eyes
Your eyes, your lips, your mouth
Your thighs, your back, you drive me wild
Tonight, the fact is I...
I'm on my way home
I'm on my way home
I lied, I tried to cry but I'm, I'm drowning in the oceans you made
When salted tears won't dry
I'll wipe my shirtsleeves
Under your eyes
These hearts will be flooded tonight
I'll wipe my shirtsleeves
Under your eyes
Your eyes, your eyes, your eyes, your eyes, your eyes
,,,
"Please, please, please don't leave me." Niall begged, his voice hoarse as my heart tore into pieces.
"I don't know if I can leave you." I choked out, his eyes watering over, tears I knew he wouldn't let loose. "But I can't keep doing this, Niall."
"No, no, please don't say that." He cried, walking towards me, tiredly.
I let out a broken sob, as I fell limp into his arms, the only place that ever felt like home to me. But he was a drug to me, addicting and destructive to anything in it's path.
"I love you so much, baby." Niall croaked in to my neck.
He kissed below my ear, slowly removing his head to look at me. His eyes were dead looking, tired, and they had a almost grey color with no trace of light or happiness in them.
I let out a cry as I took in the details of him. His slouched posture, pale skin, dark bags under his lifeless eyes, cracked lips, and shaking hands.
"You can't leave me. Not after everything we've been through, all the things we have ahead of us."
"Niall-"
"No, (Y/N), please let me explain. I've been through hell and back without you, and seeing you with him made the light inside of me dim. It kept dimming until there was nothing left. (Y/N), I'm a shell of the man I used to be with you," Niall reached up to place a stray hair behind my ear. "Without you, all I am is dark. You balance me out and keep me from doing any wrong. Please, please just give me a second chance... God, I know that I don't deserve you, but I need you more than the air we breathe because you're the thing that has me going. You're my reason to smile and laugh, baby girl. You're the reason I was so happy, and I couldn't see myself without you. But when you left me, I went cold. I'm a mess without you. You're my sunshine, (Y/N). You keep me alive, but without you I have nothing. Nothing to live for, nothing work for, and nothing to love. My world without you is black and white, (Y/N), and you've always been the colors in my life. Please give me another chance to prove myself worthy of you." Niall moved his shirtsleeve over his hand and wiped it under my eyes, drying my tears temporarily until a fresh wave of them replaced the dry ones.
"Niall, I don't know if I can do that..."
"Please, my love." Niall begged, his voice cracking. I wrapped my arms around his neck, as he engulfed me in a hug, his arms holding me as close as possible.
"I'm tired of this," I mumble in the crook of his neck. He let go of me, but his hands were protectively wrapped around my arms, holding me in place. "I know you love me, and you know I love you. But did you ever thought about how much it hurts? It hurts to see how many times people say we broke up, because I cheated, or because you cheated. I can't go out with a guy friend without millions of girls shouting at me, how I'm 'a fat cow' or 'a slut.'"
"But we'll both know that isn't true!" He begged, his shiny eyes looking into mine hopefully.
"Yes, but that doesn't change the fact that it still hurts, Niall!" I exclaimed, looking away from him. "You don't understand, girls love you! People love you, and while they're doing that, they're taking it out on me! I tried to ignored it, but while you're on tour, what do I do? I stay home, alone, while strangers call, or text me saying that I don't deserve you. I'm tired of feeling threatened all the time. I'm tired of feeling scared, and guilty, just because I decided to become your girlfriend. I didn't know it took such a high price. I don't know... maybe we should just be friends."
"No, no, no. Baby, please." He took my hands in his, peppering kisses on each of my knuckles. I simply stared sternly at his actions, standing like a statue. My tears hadn't stopped flowing, but my eyes stung from the tears.
But I'm in love.
"But I'm in love," I thought out loud. "I'm in love with you, Ni. Even if it takes me insults, and dead threats to be with you, I'll try to push through it, for you. I love you Niall, and yes I'm really tired of feeling guilty, but this isn't supposed to affect us, right?"
I was confused and vulnerable. My head was spinning and my heart hurts from how many times it was punctured by people's cruel words.
"No, it's not. You're worth any pain, (Y/N). We're worth it." Niall breathed, the faintest smile planted on his lips. "I love you more than anything, and I promise I'll be there for you, no matter what. I'll protect you, and make sure those threats come to a halt. I'll help you- I'll help us survive. You have no idea how scared I was, I thought I was going to loose you."
Before I was able to respond, he had pressed his lips to mine into a warm, and passionate kiss. I gripped his hair between my fingers, pulling at the roots gently. He parted a bit, a grin tugging at the corner of his lips, before he spoke hoarsely, "I love you (Y/N)."
~
Hey my luvs! ((:
Thanks to FanFic_165616 for helping me write this. Go follow her because she writes very well, and yours truly (cough cough me) is featured in some of her books.
Vote, comment, and all that other stuff!
XOXO Gosip Girl
