'I'M SORRY. I LOVE MY SECOND FAMILY MORE.'
Tears drop from eyes as my hands were shaking while holding my phone. Hindi ko napigilan ang sarili ko at napahagulgol na sa iyak. Tell me? Do I deserve this? All this pain? Hanggang kelan ko paba 'to mararanasan? When will I find the peace that I've wanted?!
Tanging ang paghagulgol nalang sa iyak ang nagawa ko habang nakasubsob ang mukha sa malambot na unan. Ang sakit. Ang sakit-sakit.
Mas pinili ni daddy ang pangalawang pamilya nya. Was my mom never enough? Kaming pamilya nya? Hindi pa ba sapat ang pagmamahal na binibigay namin? Mom even sacrificed her status para lang makasama si daddy. My grandparents never approved of my dad kase they want the best for my mom, pero binalewala nya 'yun kase mahal nya ng sobra si daddy. Pero anong ginawa nya?
Mas pinili nyang talikuran ang responsibilidad nya at nagpaka-ama sa ibang pamilya.
Pagak akong natawa.
Kaya nya naman pala maging ama at malambing na asawa, bakit hindi nya magawa sa amin?
Dumaan ako sa kusina at rinig ko ang mga hikbi ni mommy at sermon ni lola. Napahinga ako ng malalim. Sobrang sakit marinig ang mga iyak na 'yun. Nasasaktan ako ng sobra para kay mommy. Mahal na mahal nya si daddy pero si dad, may iba ng minamahal.
I texted my boyfriend to meet me at our favorite place. Hindi man ako swerte sa ama, swerte naman ako sa boyfriend ko. He's my everything. The definition of understanding, caring and sweet. Lahat, nasa kanya na.
Pawis ang noo nitong bumaba sa motor nya at dali-dali akong nilapitan. Isang mahigpit na yakap ang binigay nya sakin. He already knew something was wrong and the first thing he did was to hug me to calm and soothe my feelings.
I feel so lucky.
I cried so hard in his shoulders. Inilabas ko lahat ng sakit, hinagpis at lahat-lahat. I never heard him complain. Wala s'yang pake kahit basang-basa na 'yung damit nya.
He kissed me on my forehead and hugged me tighter.
"I'll forever be with you my love, always. I'll never ever think of leaving you by your side alone."
Those were the sweetest words that melted my heart. And each day, I cherish him and our memories together.
I smiled as I put the ring on his finger. His handsome face looks so happy and I wish I am too.
Tears dropped from my eyes like a river. I married him because that's what we promised to ourselves. It was the proof of our unyielding love. Pero he was the same as my father, he left me and chose his own path. He broke his promises.
Because the man of my life is peacefully sleeping inside his coffin while I cry in so much pain wearing my wedding dress. He died in an accident the day before our marriage.
