Nothing but Hurt

Chapter 1: There Goes the Last of my Pride

I touched my face as I stared at myself in the mirror, noting all of my imperfections. My light brown skin was dull looking, causing the newly formed acne on my cheek to pop out even more. My chin jutted out slightly and my dark eyes were shadowed, one bigger than the other. My chapped lips, which I chewed far too many times for my good, had a bead of blood forming on the bottom right. My nose looked flat and the dark circles under my eyes made me look like I had risen from the dead. Even my long eyelashes and thick hair, which were my favorite part of myself, looked limp.

I leaned my face down and splashed it with water, holding back my frizzy hair with one hand. But a drop of water splashed on my white pajamas, causing the soft fabric to turn slightly transparent. As I examined my appearance again, I came to the same conclusion that washing my face does not make me look fresh, but just makes me look wet and makes the frizz of my hair stick to my forehead. I groaned in frustration, giving up and stomping back to my room to change into my clothes.

Not knowing what to wear, I randomly chose a dark green turtleneck over some classic light blue jeans. I knew the colors probably didn't go together, but it was comfortable and I didn't give a damn about what others thought of my appearance... or maybe I did, but just a little bit. I slouched a bit as I walked to the full-length mirror hanging on my bedroom door and examined myself. My outfit didn't look too atrocious, but my hair certainly did. I rolled my eyes and grabbed a brush, ignoring the pain in my scalp as I roughly tried to brush out the strands. I gave up and just ran the comb through a couple more times, gently, picked out the hairs to throw away, and tied the stubborn hair back into a ponytail. I would've loved putting my hair down, but that would look atrocious, so I had to stick with my hair yanking ponytail, despite how it looked like a bushy squirrel tail.

I looked over myself one last time, wincing at my hairstyle and the frizz surrounding it, but accepted it nonetheless. It was good enough and it wasn't like my appearance meant a lot to me considering I was hardly ever noticed. I draped my classic black bag over one shoulder, grabbed my phone, which I only had to call my parents to pick me up when my after-school clubs ended (and occasionally binge-read Wattpad), and picked up another scrunchie just in case my hair tie would break again. I already had about three in the trash just from the past two weeks. The day I find a hair tie that can hold my thick and plentiful hair is the day pigs would fly. Or maybe the day that the world ends, which would be right on par with my unfortunate luck. To find a good hair tie just to never be able to use it.

I was about to calmly walk out of my bedroom door as if there were no worries in my mind when my mom called out, "The bus is here!" That got me running and I nearly tripped over one of my little brother's discarded toy cars as I rushed to get to the door on time. When I passed the dining table, I grabbed a protein bar and was halfway out the door when my mom stopped me.

"I was kidding," she told me. "There is no other way to get you ready so fast. Even though you don't take a shower."

I stared at her, jaw agape. "First of all," I placed my full hands on my hips, ignoring my mom's sigh, "you tell me not to take a bath in the morning because of Covid and that's why I take it after school. Second of all, there was no need to do that because I swear I almost got a heart attack. Third of all," I paused, not knowing what to say and just stood there awkwardly, trying to hang on to my remaining pieces of pride.

"Breakfast is ready." My mom walked away, her messy bun, which was messy and not fashionable, shaking with her movements. "Oh, and if you had a brain, you would've realized it was only 7:05 and the bus doesn't come until at least 15 minutes later." Well, there goes the last of my non-existent ego.

I slumped over to the dining table and took off my backpack, resting my phone on the dining table. I launched myself into the chair and stretched my legs out as far as I could until I got that satisfied feeling of actually stretching where my muscles began to burn. My mom placed a plate in front of me.

"Upma?" I groaned, staring at the popular South Indian breakfast dish which I didn't necessarily enjoy. "Can I at least have sev?" The small noodles which were made of chickpea flour paste and were fried after being submerged in mouth-watering spices always made the breakfast better.

"Only if you finish half of the plate first." My mom told me. "After that, you can take it."

I huffed in annoyance but gobbled up half the plate and hopped out of my seat to grab the packet. As soon as I got it, I breathed in the savory smell and sighed, content. I ate the rest of my breakfast with a smile. The crunchy sev tasted amazing with the soft upma.

As soon as I finished, I washed my hands, took a mask, picked up my backpack and phone, and practically ran out the door. "Bye!" I yelled, drawing out the letter 'e'. We were the only family in our building, so nobody cared if I made noise. Our front-door neighbor was always working and the downstairs neighbors were old and didn't have good hearing. I flew down the stairs and turned the handle of the building door. Time for the lonely nightmare called school.

A/N: Hey guys. So this is a new account, and the first parts of this story can be found on my old joint account (bookloversclub3, on which I was R), but updates will only commence on this. Please vote and comment because I want some constructive criticism, not just to better my writing, but rather to also motivate me to write more.

Thank you so much for reading this!