Still Alive - Adam Stanheight

Chapter 16

"You look like you're about to vomit, Adam," John says, staring suspiciously at the pale boy. He had taken Adam back to his office for a private chat while Amanda and Lawrence dealt with Liliana's body.

"I don't know what you want me to say," Adam responds, doing his best to swallow back tears from what he just witnessed.

John quickly changes topic. "You know, this doesn't usually happen. I plan out my traps with the utmost thought and detail. What happened tonight was an accident, possibly on Amanda's part, but she will never admit to that."

Adam is internally relieved that the man hasn't figured out that it was him. Not that it mattered anyway because Liliana died regardless. Tweaking a trap was never going to work again.

"What are you going to do about her husband?" Adam then asks with sorrow. "He is better off without her," John replies immediately. "Her death will be set up like someone murdered her, meaning he won't carry that guilt with him."

Adam gasps at the man's lack of empathy. "How the fuck do you know that?" he asks, his anger rising.

"Trust me, Adam," John says, dismissive of Adam's indignation. "She didn't value human life, causing him to not value it either as a result. Now that she is gone, he will value his life more than he ever did before."

As Adam begins to crack even more, he almost lets his true intentions show. "You might think I'm here because I'm overly grateful for what you did. Yeah, I am but not in the way you think. You leaving me to rot in that bathroom haunts my dreams every fucking night! It took me so long to get my appetite back, I shiver up at the sight of blood even if it's a tiny cut and I can't use the bathroom with the door locked or lights off! Maybe I've improved as a human being, but you didn't completely change my life for the better! I'm here because if I go back to the way I was, you'd put me in another fucking trap!"

John sighs, almost as if he understands what Adam is going through. "I understand that healing hasn't been easy but if you are changing, then so be it. Also, I told you before that I will not put you in another trap. You may not think it but I always keep my promises."

"We'll see about that," Adam responds, calming himself down a bit. Despite his anguish, he has to remember what he is doing this for. Himself, Brielle, the past Jigsaw victims and the yet-to-be victims.

***

Brielle switches off the tape after Adam plays the whole recording of today's events for her. "Holy shit, Ad. You almost gave yourself away."

"I know I couldn't help it," Adam sighs. "The bastard really got into my head. I don't know how much longer I can take this, but I have to keep going."

Brielle wraps her arm around his shoulder. "No matter what you do, I'll be by your side. We're closer to getting this guy every day. I think it could happen before he even gets to put another person in a trap. If he asks you to kidnap someone again, I can help you plan an ambush."

"That'd be great, but I'm too tired tonight to think that far ahead," Adam says, yawning. He then gets up from the couch. "I'm gonna take a shower," he says, his voice trembling.

Brielle stops him before he can go. "I heard you saying in the tape that you haven't been able to take a bath since. I've noticed that too. I first thought it was because you were guilty about taking some of my hot water, but there's definitely more to it than that, right?"

"It triggers the worst memories," Adam responds. "Anytime I see one all I can think about is waking up in freezing, shitty water that smells like piss. It's crazy how one object can fuck up my life so hard." He lets out a small chuckle, not really believing what he just said.

Brielle nods sympathetically, which then gives her an idea. "Come with me," she says as she grabs his hand and brings him to the bathroom and turns on the light. She then plugs the drain into the bath and begins to fill it up. "What are you doing?" Adam asks with worry.

"You need good memories associated with a bath to get rid of the triggering ones," Brielle replies with sincerity. "I'll be with you the entire time and if it becomes too much, we can stop, okay?"

Adam doesn't know what to say at first, but he knows he can trust Brielle with all his heart. "You sure this is gonna work?"

"Positive," Brielle responds confidently, even though she's not entirely sure herself but she's willing to try anything to help him. "You can trust me."

Adam gulps nervously, but takes her word for it. He watches as Brielle fills the bath with lukewarm water which feels beautiful compared to the chilling trap water. She mixes in a coconut bubble mix which smells divine. She also lights some scented candles to set the relaxing tone.

"So, does it look appealing?" Brielle asks pointing to the finished, bubbly bath. "Very," Adam answers truthfully. "But I'm still scared shitless. "

Brielle stands up. "I'll get in first. You go get the towels. I promise you, this is gonna be so relaxing."

"Okay," Adam replies a little less nervously as he leaves the room, closing the door so Brielle can strip in privacy. She then slides in, sighing with relaxation. The temperature of the water is absolutely perfect. She leans her head against the edge and closes her eyes and the bubbles cover her in warmth.

Adam returns to see Brielle completely chilled out. "I'm not lying when I say I could fall asleep in here," she tells him, who feels much better now that he sees that she is comfortable in the bath, meaning he will be too. He slips his shirt off, second-thoughts still spinning in his mind.

Brielle opens her eyes, to see Adam a little hesitant still. "You gotta get in here," she urges, which fortunately gives him the final push to go for it.

Brielle shuts her eyes once Adam continues to undress. As soon as she hears his feet touch the water, she reaches out for his hand. She notices that he is trembling but encourages him the best she can. Within a few seconds, his nerves begin to leave as he's finally in fully, the warm, scented water completely relaxing him.

"Oh my God, that feels so nice," he sighs happily. Brielle opens her eyes to see him opposite her, comfortably clinging his body. She sits up slightly. "You did it! You okay?"

Adam nods in certainty. "Yeah, I'm good. I'm surprised it's actually working. Maybe it's because you're with me."

Brielle chuckles and then spreads out her arms. "Come here." Adam shifts his position and Brielle scoops him up. She wraps her arms around his shoulders as he rests his head on her shoulder. As much as he won't admit it, Adam loves being held as much as he loves holding Brielle.

The two lie down in silence for a while, not taking this tranquil feeling for granted. "Thank you, Brie," Adam then says softly, genuinely thankful for everything she has done for him. Brielle gives him a kiss on the head, still cuddling against him tight. "No need to thank me. You're the one getting through it." She begins to play with his hair with a free hand, which then gives her an idea.

"Want me to wash your hair?"

"Please do."

Once Brielle is done, Adam is in such a meditative state that he might want to stay in this bath all night. Brielle kisses his rinsed hair once more before climbing out to dry off. She stays in the room as she puts on her pyjama tank top and matching bottoms, just in case Adam is too nervous without her. Once she's dressed, she hands Adam his towel. "You're gonna be cold for a second, okay?" she warns. Adam nods, ready to get this over with. As soon as he's handed that towel, he wraps it around his entire body. "It's not so bad," he then says. Brielle smiles proudly as she hands him his pyjama bottoms. That can't have been an easy thing to do, but he got through it. Best of all, he may never be afraid of baths again.

An hour later, Adam is soundly sleeping, Brielle snuggled up against him. She looks at him to see how tranquil and uninterrupted he looks in his sleep. It overjoys her when this happens. She strokes her hand on his chest and kisses him on the temple before drifting off to sleep herself.

"This will happen every night very soon, Adam," she whispers, shutting her eyes.

***

(inspired by the story "Scrawny" by popmist)