Silence in the Storm

Toxins.

Days went by and I was getting angrier by the minute.
Even though I didn't get any decent answer as to why he refused to kiss me in any circumstance, Soap was still visiting me at late evenings to have sex. Not that I was complaining; he would leave me beyond satisfied and he would go back to his duties just as same... He was amazing with his tongue, hands and dick. We were bringing relief to our stress on a nightly basis.

But the idea of not being kissed, not even a quick peck or a messy lick on the lips, was definitely bothering me deeply. I needed a plausible explanation as to why he was withholding some things. Even though I was well versed on human behavior, his particularities were indeed an annoying puzzle.

Another night went on, and after maintaining the aftercare of Elise's and Keegan's health conditions through physiotherapy, I secluded myself to my tent. I simply changed my pants to a sleeping shorts and kept the tank top. While I was enjoying a cup of tea, I heard the usual knocking at the tent's pole. It was Soap, as always.
As soon as I unzipped the tent he barged in with urgency; with an uncontrollable erection nearly peeking out of the sweatpants' hem, lunging at my neck and pulling me by the waist with passion, making me feel his bulge against my crotch. Although I felt tempted to surrender to his gropings and get railed by him once again, I had to supress my urges and have a serious talk. I tried to get away from his lustful grasp, to no avail.

- Johnny, we need to talk...

- We can talk after a good fuck... I missed you...

- Wait, what?!? - the struggle was real.

He kept groping, nibbling, leaving hickeys and almost ripping my clothes off. I had no other alternative than to grab his face and force a kiss on his lips, just to get a reaction out of him. And as I predicted, it worked like a charm; he promptly backed down.

- S-sorry, I... - he was stuttering.

- Cool off and sit down, Soap. We need to talk.

- Whatever you need, Mo' Leannan... - he cautiously sat on my desk chair. - Wot's the bother?

- The 'bother' is exactly that: you're withholding certain physical contacts. Why?

That question was stingy to him. He paused for a long minute before clearing out his throat and formulate a convincing answer. I've sat down on the edge of my bed, with my arms crossed over my chest, waiting for his reply. Hesitantly, a nervous fidget Soap decided to speak up.

- Well, ye got me there, eh... I-I'm not trying to be nasty or anything, but I feel like I'm not ready yet.

- Not ready yet for what? For a kiss between us?

- I feel like a kiss is too intimate, anno? - he glanced at me with worried eyes. - And I don't want to give you false hopes.

- We're both adults, Soap. If you've been honest with me upfront, I would've follow suit. Your silence and avoidance gave space to a lot of weird conclusions.

- I'm sorry for that... I still...

- You still hold feelings for Elise, right? - I've lined out a resigned downward grin.

- ...Sort of.

- Very well. - I got up, crossing the cardigan over me. - I will respect that. But we will have to diminish our sexual activities.

- Fair enough. - he got up, letting out a sigh. - I'm not going to overstep your boundaries.

- Efcharistó, agapití mou Soap.

- No problems. - he walked towards the tent entrance. - I guess our fun is over for the night, eh... Better get going.

- You can stay and cuddle... Is not the same as sex or our movie session at the base lounge, but is part of the deal.