Male OC x Louise Belcher | A Bob's Burgers Fanfic

Crawl Space

I DO NOT own Bob's Burgers. This is just for entertaining purposes.

Tanner's POV:

I was sleeping in the living room, as that's where I've been sleeping since I first arrived and met the Belchers. Being an experienced outdoors person, I was able to endure the most uncomfortable sleeping arrangements I've ever imagined. I slept in the corner, out of the way so I don't disturb the family if they have family time in the living room. It was a rainy morning and there've been leaks around the apartment. I've actually been able to fix most of them last night while the family was sleeping. Just wanted to help out. I woke up from my sleeping bag and went into the kitchen to see the Belchers. 

No POV:

Gene: (Chewing on cereal)

(Playback of cereal crunching on his keyboard)

Bob: Gene?

Crunch, Crunch, Crunch, Crunch, Crunch

Bob: Gene?!

Crunch, Crunch, Crunch, Crunch

Bob: (sigh) Gene?!

Crunch, BURP!

Gene: What?

Bob: Stop!

I couldn't help but chuckle which brought their attention to me.

Bob: Oh, morning, Tanner.

Tanner: (YAWN) Morning, Mr. B. Morning, you guys.

He sat down at the table as Linda gave him a bowl, thanked her, and I poured some cereal. 

Linda: Bob, no more newspaper, please. My parents are gonna be here any minute.

Bob: I know. You know how I know they're coming? Because you go into a crazy cleaning frenzy every time. It's like the way animals freak out before an earthquake.

Linda: That's nice. That's not true.

Louise: She's spooked.

Linda: Louise, you're gettin' cereal everywhere.

Louise: I'm having a seizure! Put a wallet in my mouth!

Linda: 😠

Louise: It passed.

Linda: Look at this place. It's a disaster. You haven't even fixed the leak yet.

Bob: Come on. Linda, the leak is contained.

Linda: Bobby!

(Dripping)

Bob: What? You barely notice those.

(Tina walks in and-)

Tina: Aah!

(. . . trips over the pots catching the drops.)

Tina: I'm ok.

Linda: Trust me, Bobby. My mother will notice that our ceiling is leaking.

Bob: (sighs) Yeah, you're right. She will, repeatedly and loudly.

Linda: Just fix it, please. Be my All-American fix-it man, Bobby.

Bob: Fine. I'll go up to the attic and fix the leak.

Linda: But I also need you and the kids to work out Whose room my folks are sleepin' in, Because I have to go check the bathroom for stray hairs.

(Sprays/wipes Tina's glasses) No one sheds like this family.

It's like a bunch of chewbaccas.

Bob: So where are grandma and grandpa gonna sleep?

Louise: Gene's room smells like farts.

Gene: That makes sense.

Bob: Great. Well, we'll put 'em in there, then. Maybe they'll leave sooner when they smell farts.

Gene: Yeah.

Tina: Gene can sleep with me in my room As long as he doesn't mind my night terrors.

Bob: Huh?

Tina: Remember, you let me watch "night of the living d*ad" when I was 8, So now I wake up every night standing in the middle of my room, Scratching the air, and kicking.

Gene: Oh, good.

Bob: Wait. You still get those?

Tina: Yeah. They're weirder now.

Bob: Oh, boy.

Tina: I think my subconscious fears and my budding sexuality Are getting all mixed up.

Bob: (hastily) Ok, I--Tina, I don't want to hear-

Tina: So I think I'm being att*cked by zombies, And I start screaming, "do you wanna make out?" And I make out with it.

Bob/Gene/Louise/Tanner: (Brief awkward silence)