Blood and Air |The Sequel| {Bakugo X FemOC}

Thoughts*

4* rating. Will let you know where it starts.

TW: mental illness being displayed physically. I know I usually don't put any warnings since it is heavily involved with Mira, but I kinda went a little deep on this one. Just beware

The world was drenched in silence, a blur wafting past me, not a sound or color staying in my mind for more than a fleeting moment. A little body was curled into my side, an anchor to this world to keep my thoughts from spiraling even darker than they have.

I almost lost him, yesterday. If it wasn't for the split second of a reaction that my mind wasn't able to produce, today would be so very different. 

Would I have gone in a rage? Would I have snapped and lost my regard for anything, killing my cousin in the process? Or would I have lost all feelings and sat there like a shell?

I don't want to know. 

I do not want to know what it would feel like to lose Katsuki. Even the thought sends a dull knife into my heart, gutting, wrenching a hole in me.

"Mira... Mira?" I blink as a little voice calls my name, looking down to see Eri looking up at me with her big red eyes. A smile flitted across my lips automatically as my hand, that was nestled on her arm, began to stroke her hair.

"Yes, Angel?" I ask, softly. I was still afraid of speaking too loud, startling her. She hated the loud noises, shouting.

"Do you think I can smile like you?"

I froze momentarily, the question coming from left-field. My brows scrunched and my heart crunched with her soft words. Her sad words. 

The pain I used to feel at not being able to express myself, something I got used to because it went for everything. Anger, fear, annoyance, joy -- nothing would show on my face equally.

But for Eri, she was unable to smile. She tried but her wobbly lips couldn't make the joy she could sometimes show in her eyes. When she saw my smile for the first time, she broke down in tears and hugged me so tight I thought something tore inside me.

Such a young girl, and stopped from physically showing her joy, her love. Such a sweet, young girl.

Blinking away the tears that pressed behind my eyes, I took little Eri's body into mine, hugging her tight.

"I know you will be able to smile, Angel. Not like me," I tell her fiercely, her little arms hugging me back just as tight. "You will smile better than me. Better than anyone can ever smile."

"I love you, Mira."

I hugged her tighter, face into her silver hair, loving the way she smelled like flowers instead of that anti-bacterial soap they used to drench her in.

"And I love you, Eri."

********************

Sunday evening, as I returned to the dorm building after tucking Eri into bed, my mind was still awake, even with my tired body. After the usage of my quirk, the questioning by the police, the act in front of the board members, unable to let go of Katsuki or sleep at night with fear he may be targeted again... I knew my muscles were tired. 

Knew they ached as I ran around the campus, struggling to clear the fog from my mind. The thoughts that threatened to crush me. I was trying to think of what to say to Itsuki, when I would see him tomorrow after classes. Hoping that would be enough from the dark smoke of thoughts that wanted to suffocate the air from my body.

The run helped, like it always does. The burn in my lungs focused me, the ache and numbness in my legs forced me to put my energy into keeping myself upright. When I returned sweaty, nearly limping from my overused body, Kyoka and Mina told me to take a bath and join them for movie night.