The Emery Chronicles: The White King's Woman (FIRST BOOK)

Chapter 23

Chapter Twenty Three- Corruption

This time, Gavin did not spend hours holding and admiring his daughter minutes after her birth.

With one last heave, the baby was born and Bianca quietly, almost regrettably, announced it was a girl. Arwen did not get to hold her before Gavin walked in and asked for the gender.

"Another princess, My Lord," Bianca told him, handing him the swaddled child. He looked down at her, but did not tear as he had with Amaryllis a year before. He smiled at her little crooning, then swallowed as if he had taken something bitter and handed her back to Bianca before waltzing out of the room as quickly as he had come in. He had not even glanced at Arwen.

A week later, the godsman blessed her with the name Arwen had picked on her own, Cerelia, for she had not spoken to Gavin at all. He had not visited her, and they had not talked about anything. No business, no baby names, no promises of passionate love. Nothing.

After the blessing celebrations were over, Gavin had retired to the bedchambers, but Arwen went to the nursery to sit with her children a while. She watched little Amaryllis sleep in her small bed, breathing evenly and deeply. She held the new baby Cerelia in her arms, admiring the way her thin little hand circled around Arwen's one finger. Cerelia was smaller than Amaryllis had been, her face not as round or rosy. She had thicker hair, though, darker and curlier than her older sister's. Her eyes were the same blue as Amaryllis's, though not as round. They were not beady, but they were small and almost squinty, giving her a look of wisdom in her small, young face.

"We still love you, we do." Arwen whispered to her as Cerelia fell asleep in her arms. "We love our perfect little princesses." A single tear escaped her eye and landed on her baby's forehead. She kissed the spot it landed on, then placed Cerelia in her crib and left her daughters to the care of their nurses.

***

Gavin huffed and panted as he plunged in and out of Arwen. He was taking her from behind, as he had started doing after Cerelia's birth. They had tried making love this way a few times, earlier in their marriage, but before it had been pleasurable. Gavin would kiss the back of Arwen's neck and the spot between her shoulder blades, sending shivers down her spine. He would use his hands to run his strong fingers through her hair, or he liked to massage her breasts as he would slowly grind against her back. They used to please each other, even when they didn't face each other.

Now, Arwen knew Gavin took her from behind on purpose. It was so he wouldn't have to face her. Their lovemaking could no longer be called that; it was simply a duty or a chore for Gavin. Every night, after a long day of business meetings that left him tired and dogged-looking, he come into the bedchambers and undressed. Even if he came in late, Arwen already asleep, he'd wake her up and turn her over so he could do his chore. No kissing, no fondling, no sighs of desire. They would simply get into their positions and do the deed.

Now he thumped against her back, their skin making slapping noises as he pushed himself inside of her, but other than that, neither of them made a noise. Arwen was not even naked; Gavin never bothered to undress her and admire her body before entering anymore. He would just lift her skirts up so he could do his job.

Her thighs and her back ached, but not in a pleasant way. It was painful now, to have him in her. Arwen never thought she could hate being with her husband, but she was starting to.

As he finished, draining himself in her, then pulling out and finding his trousers on the ground, Arwen began to tear up, and slow, silent tears rolled down her face. She pulled her dress back down over her soar back and legs and lay on the bed on her side, facing away from Gavin. She sucked in a deep breath that made a noise, too much noise: Gavin noticed.

"Arwen?" He asked, his voice tired and monotonous. She turned over and sat up so he could see her tears in the moonlight. "What's wrong?"

Arwen looked at him incredulously. "What's wrong?" She asked back. "What's wrong!" She ripped her blankets off of her and stood. She began pacing in front of her vanity, unsure of where she could go, what she could do.

"Arwen, please don't yell, I've had a tiring day as it is." Gavin sighed and sat on the edge of the bed, not even looking at her as he spoke.

"Of course you did, you always have tiring days now. But it's not my fault they tire you! Why should I be the one punished?" She turned on him, crossing her arms in front of her and biting back more tears.

"You? You think you're the one punished?" He seethed, finally looking up at her. His eyes were bloodshot and weary, but angry and fiery all the same. "I'm the one who has to deal with all the ridicule and opposition, I'm the one who has to try to convince my own councilmen, some of my closest friends, that I am a capable ruler, I'm the one who has to defend you to everyone. I'm the one, me! You just sit and complain about all the people who hate you, but you never actually deal with them! I'm the one who does that!"

"Fine! It's you, it's all you! Take pity on yourself, but don't come back to me at night and put me through pain and expect me to feel sorry for you!"

"Oh, I'm sorry, did it hurt?" Gavin stood and marched up to Arwen, not touching her, but bringing his face close to hers. His eyes were crazed as he spit his words out. "You know what hurts worse? When your friends don't believe you can make a son. When they ridicule your marriage constantly, and say that you deceived me into this marriage and now we're both being punished by the gods who won't give us an heir. Try defending yourself against that every goddamn day and tell me what hurts worse!" He turned and walked up to the bed, grabbing a pillow and throwing it violently against a wall.

Arwen stood dumbfounded, watching him. "And you believe that? Do you really believe that?"

"I try not to, but the evidence is against me. Why have we no son? Why!" He put his head against the wall and punched it with his hands.

Arwen walked up to him and hugged him from behind. "We'll have a son, we will. Please Gavin, please believe me. I love you, please." Gavin sighed as Arwen rubbed his back and kissed the back of his neck. He turned and gently took her hands off of him.

"It's late, we should sleep." Without another word, he went to the bed and did just that, leaving Arwen still in pain, but this time the pain was in her heart not her legs.

***

Arwen watched her two daughters be washed and dressed by their nurses the next morning, her mother by her side.

"He hates me, mother. I don't know if he can get past this." She tried not to cry again, focusing on the goofy smiles on her daughters faces instead.

"He does not hate you. And he'll be calmer once you tell him you're expecting again." Bianca had told Arwen early that morning as the sun rose that she was once again bearing a child.

"I hope so. But this child has to be a boy. If it's not... I don't know, I don't know what will happen." She shook her head, tired and depressed. She couldn't imagine how just a little while ago she had thought she was the happiest woman alive.

A page came into the chambers and approached Arwen. He bowed before saying, "His majesty requests the presence of Her majesty in his business chambers."

"Now?" Arwen's heart beat erratically, her nerves on edge.

"Yes. And the Lady Bianca is to accompany you." Arwen looked confusedly to her mother who only took her daughter's arm and told the page to lead the way. Arwen looked back at her children before they turned the corner out of the room, trying to keep a picture of them in her mind as they were led to Gavin.

Something was wrong.