If I can't die at least let me sleep

2

UNEDITED

Now it's been 5 weeks since I've last heard or seen of anybody. I don't have a fever anymore, but I'm always tired. Not just because I'm lazy, it's also because of the illness that has taken over the past boy. His- my name is Rhys Azalea Everdeen. I'm 4 years old and I should've been dead by now. But, apparently that rip off god wants me to live in his place now.

At least I've started to slowly complete my mission. My brother, Zachary, has been clinging onto my side like a koala, so I have been able to make progress with my plan. He's so cute though. I often cuddle with him in my bed, and we just talk about our day or random things that come to mind. He always makes me talk about my day and thoughts first because I always end up falling asleep by the time he finishes talking about his day.

It's not like I mean to, it just happens. At least he doesn't hold it against me.

I have learned that he's very busy with heir studies, because my parents don't want to force me to do anything because I'm basically on my death bed. Sometimes I try to joke about my situation with Zach, but he always shuts me down. I mean, at least joke about my position instead of being depressed about it. Ugh. This century has no sense of humor.

Coming out of my own world, I turn to see Zach leaning against the headrest. He was staring down at me with his deep forest green eyes. So many emotions and thoughts were swirling within his crystal like eyes. But, the only emotion I could decipher was worry. Probably because his amazing, cute, adorable, funny (the list goes on) younger brother was staring off into space. His gorgeous curly black hair was in between my fingers before I could even stop myself. It was soft and bouncy. Soon I realize what I was doing, and almost manage to pull my hand out. But, I stop myself seeing him relaxing into my touch like a kitten. He was only two years older than me, but from the looks of his growing eye bags, he has no time to relax, unlike me. I feel bad.

Seeing his state it just makes me want to baby him, despite the difference in our ages. Sitting up with a little bit of struggle, I see him jolt in surprise. He tries to push me down again, but instead I lay him down as gently as I can. He needs sleep more than I do, and with this opportunity we can sleep together. Hopefully our bond will grow closer with this maneuver.

After laying him down successfully, I tuck both of use into the covers. "How about we sleep together. It'll be fun, and you need it." I say with a warm voice that sounds like I could pass out at any minute. He seems nervous, but after sending him a small smile he sighs with a 'there's nothing I could do about this' expression. I'm slightly offended, but I'll let it slide this once.

Snuggling closer to his side, I fall asleep to the rhythm of his breathing, and the palpitations of his heart.

Zachary pov

After finally being able to hang out with my little brother for the first time, these past 5 weeks have made it impossible to go back to before. I have become too attached, and he has become one of the best things that have appeared in my life. He's so sweet and kind that he can't help but make me worry about him.

Looking down at my sleeping brother, I can't help but adore him. I brush his wispy white bangs away as gently as possible, worried I'll interrupt his "beloved and cherished sleep", as he likes to call it.

He worries me. He sleeps almost all day, and when he is awake, he looks like he could pass out at any moment of the day. He has deeper eye bags than me, which I personally think add to his charm and cuteness, and tiredness is the one emotion that swirls continuously in his beautiful mismatched eyes. My little brother is very expressive so it's easy to see the emotions that come and go through his eyes, but tiredness never leaves, ever.

Even after sleeping for 18 hours, he went right back to bed after hanging out with me for only 2.

Whenever he tries to joke about him dying it makes me feel even worse. How could he just joke about dying like that. For example, like how he's "so sad that he could die right now" or when he doesn't feel good and says, "this literally sucks, if I feel like this tomorrow I'm just going to kill my self", or when something doesn't go his way, "this is my 13th reason, prepare not to see me again Zach." I DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS, but it makes me even more afraid.

It feels like his life could slip away at any moment. I'm afraid the next time he'll fall asleep he'll never be able to wake up again.

Whenever he wakes up I'm showered in a sense of relief, but when he falls asleep, my body freezes to the touch, with anxiety coursing through my veins.

Even now, I pull his body as close to mine as possible. Feeling his slow beating heart, I warm up a bit, but it still feels like I have a cold sweat all throughout my body. Holding him so close to me I can feel how little he is. Barely any body fat, and absolutely no muscle, it's not wonder he could barely sit up to tuck me in.

I try to wake him up every time he has a meal to make sure he's at least eating healthily, but when he eats, he can't even eat half a bowl of soup. He's smaller than most kids his age, making him look almost 3.

Rhys's ghostly white skin is so pretty and fair with no blemishes, but that's only because he doesn't go outside. At least he's still able to blush. I start chuckling to myself remembering when he got so embarrassed his face, ears, neck, and even his shoulders were bright red.

But thinking about it again, Rhys also often looks out into the distance with blank eyes. He feels like he could just disappear at any moment, not caring that I will long to see him when he leaves. Almost as if he belongs somewhere else. Like one of the gods is calling him, begging him to come join them in heaven.

I won't let them. I have to keep this angel all to myself, and no one else can have him.

I may only be 6, but I've seen enough to know how cruel this world is. I've finally found salvation in this hell, and no one will be able to take him away from me.

So, I must protect this angel, even if I have to chain him down to earth. It's too early for him and Rhys has yet to experience anything yet. Alright, I've decided to start plan: "Make Rhys happy and healthy."

Starting off with going outside should do.

ALRIGHT TWO CHAPTERS DONE. PLEASE COMMENT ON PARTS YOU LIKED AND I WOULD LOVE TO HEAR YOUR FEED BACK!!!!