If I can't die at least let me sleep

4

UNEDITED

Waking up today felt refreshing. I was looking forward to today. Seeing the sky, and the flowers up close. It would definitely be more beautiful than the view from my balcony.

Sitting up, which was a struggle, I turned to my side to reach over my bedside table. I grabbed the cute little golden bell that called the servants to my room.

But, instead of seeing a maid walk in, I saw Zach walk in with a tray of breakfast. He had this big smile on his face, and I could tell he looked overjoyed. Sally, my personal maid walked in right after him.

They both had a kind expression as they helped me with my morning routine. Not being able to really use a lot of my muscles has made doing regular day to day tasks hard, so someone usually helps me.

It was endearing to see my older brother help feed me my soup. Although, using my hand and arms was one of the only things I could do, I didn't want to spoil the warm atmosphere. So, I just let him do as he pleased.

After eating what I could manage, Sally picked me up and brought me to the bathroom. It's very embarrassing for a once-an-adult to be bathed, so I locked Zach out of the room.

I zoned out for most of the bath, but I did come back to my senses when Sally helped get me dressed. I wore a thin white blouse, with 3/4 ruffled sleeves that stopped a little longer than normal because of my "smaller than average" body. Which just means I'm a skinny queen. At least that's what I say to get over the fact that I have spaghetti arms.

I also wore some cute khaki shorts that were a little shorter than knee length. Thankfully my illness hasn't taken away all of my height yet.

After Sally fixed up my fluffy white hair, she sat me down in my wheelchair. Rolling me out of my closet, I'm met with an excited Zach. He quickly runs over to me and him and Sally switch places. Now Zachary was pushing me down the hallway with Sally following close behind us.

When we're near the exit of our mansion, two more maids, and this very sturdy and muscular man quickly follows the line of people. As I'm rolled out of the two doors, I quickly cover my eyes because of the unfamiliar brightness of the sun.

After my eyes relax to the lighting, I uncover my face.

To say I'm happy would be an understatement. I am through the moon with delight. My smile is so wide that my cheeks hurt.

Looking around I see so many pretty trees, flowers, and even the grass looks beautiful.
Looking behind me with a smile, I look at the train of people behind me. The two maids, the bulky man, and Sally all return a soft smile. They look really happy to be out here as well.

Finally, looking directly behind me I see Zach. He's looking at me with so much joy and happiness that I can't help also smiling even more. Now my cheeks really feel like they're going to fall off.

I was too overjoyed to take in anything but the scenery. After having that loving moment with my brother, I once again begin looking around. Oh, how I would love to run around in the grass. Feel the breeze in my face begin to go faster because of my accelerating speed. Everything.

I sadden a little at the thought, but I'm determined to make my dreams come true before it's too late. I call over Sally and tell her my plans. She looks worried but gives into my puppy eyes.

I told her to just assist me after I take a couple steps by myself. Now I'm not going to say I was one hundred present physically or mentally prepared, but my determination is very strong.

Taking a deep breath in, I put some weight into my arms. Pushing my butt off of the seat in my wheel chair, I hear some disturbance behind me. I know they're probably worried or shocked, but I can't stop now.

After fully coming off my seat, I try to just steady myself. I could already feel my legs wobbling and shaking, but I think I can do it.

I take another deep breath and stand up straight. My expression softens when I look at my surroundings once again, and it helps me have some peace of mind.

Slowly and carefully, I lift my left foot off of the ground. This would be my first time walking since I reincarnated. I think to myself. I can do this.

After moving my left foot forward a little while it was still in the air, I begin to place it back onto the ground. Next I mimicked that motion on my right leg and foot. I was slowly beginning to walk towards a tree surrounded by flowers.

The tree was huge, and it was in the center of the garden. It was beautiful, and being able to go where I wanted on my own two feet felt exhilarating.

I wanted to run, jump, maybe even do a cartwheel, but just walking felt amazing. I was happy. For once, after waking up in this story, this world, I felt as though I was truly a person. Not just someone going to die once again, not a soul in another's body, I felt like I, me, my being, was Rhys Azalea Everdeen.

I could feel happy tears slide down my cheeks as I felt the bark of the grand tree in front of me. I slumped down, sitting in front of the tree, my back sliding against the dark wood of the tree. I felt free. Opening my eyes to look in front of me I saw everyone smile happily at me. I even saw Sally and Zachary also crying tears of joy.

I once again smile the brightest smile I could muster. This one felt the realest smile I've presented in years. The stretch of my cheeks, the slight squint of my eyes, even the breeze against my teeth. They were all truly real.

My body aches, but I don't regret a thing. This experience was the greatest gift I could've gotten.

Slowly Zachary sat next to me, also enjoying the view of the garden and sun. He snuggled up close to me, holding me lovingly and protectively. I was tired. Really, really tired. But, I think today has been the best so far in this world.

I want to live in this world with my family and friends. This is what I was longing for in my past and present. And now that I've finally gotten this feeling I will never let go of this joy.

Smiling to myself, I rest my head on Zach's shoulder. We should do this tomorrow too, I think as my eyes drift off and I slowly enter the world of dreams.

I REALLY HOPED U LIKED THIS CHAPTER. I KINDA BULLSHITTED THIS WHOLE CHAPTER BUT I HAD FUN WRITING IT. GOOD NIGHT AND MORNING!!!! LOVE YA