ONE LAST CHANCE | Draco Malfoy

chapter 42

I still think about what Draco said when we met in the train at the start of the school year. I don't want you anymore were his exact words that day.

And now? Now we are what? Something like a thing?

I was more than only on my dopamine hormones. I felt every little muscle inside my body, every movement or emotion that flashed inside of me. I felt everything when Draco admitted we were more than just a sex-relationship.

He never said we are in a partnership now though. Draco only said that we are something like a thing. Is a thing a relationship filled with trust and actually love? I don't think Draco was in love with me just yet. And it doesn't hurt me to know this if I'm being honest. I totally understand his point of view and I understand his situation with Astoria, his ex. I get that he is not able to get in love in a matter of weeks. I understand that he needs his time. And I want to give him this time. I want Draco to feel comfortable around me without force. I don't want to make it look as if I try to rush things; as if I try to rush him.

He will be ready to choose as soon as he will be ready to choose. Draco will choose what he wants eventually. He isn't a stupid guy, he is simply a broken soul that was misunderstood quite a few times. He may seem heartless and as if he can't emphasise with others, but truly, he was the one to be missed emphasising on the most.

I don't know what is going on in his life, besides that he had the heartbreak that made him change. Draco doesn't tell me anything about him or his family besides if I ask him. But even then, he tries to keep his answers short. He clearly doesn't want to dig into topics like this; into topics about him. Because that would consider to open up. And that's what Draco wants to do least.

"Tell me the way you grew up," I look up at Draco as I'm laying on his chest. High grass surrounding us, giving nobody a vision of Draco and me. It's a warm autumn day, the sun is hidden behind the clouds, creating a rather dusky daylight. "You don't have siblings, right?"

"Right." Draco answers, giving no further details. I bite my lip, feeling a little pushed back.

"Do you have any pets then?" I continue.

"I had a snake once." Draco looks up at the sky as he answers my questions. He doesn't seem bothered or bored about me asking, but rather plain feeling. "When I was twelve."

"Really? What snake?" I never thought Draco would have a snake as his pet.

Draco sighs out. "An extremely rare form of a pied ball python. Was my birthday present from my parents, costed more than a 10,000$."

"Oh wow, that's a lot. What happened to it?" Draco doesn't answer this question right away. He seems in thoughts, probably deciding on how much to reveal me. He does that a lot. Taking his time to go over the pro and contra list on how much he can tell me about him. That's making me feel uncomfortable because he is hiding a lot from me. He decided to be in a 'partnership' with me and still has the feeling that he has to hide things from me.

Example with his sweater; just like the very first time, he never takes it off during sex. I may be interpreting too much into his actions but it feels like he doesn't take it off due to a reason. I don't know why but there surely is one. It's not only that he doesn't take it off, but that, whenever we have sex, we have it in situations where he doesn't need to take it off at all. Like when he pulls me into small cabinets during class breaks and we have to be quick. Or when he, I have the feeling, plans our sex at extra tight schedules so that we don't have the time to get fully undressed. It feels as if he would only take the chance to get intimate with me when it's best for him to stay as dressed as possible, and still please his and my needs.