Frostbitten

Chapter 14

Trigger warning on this chapter, mentions r@pe.

I don't remember a lot of the fight and I assume that's because of the hold hydra has on my mind. I know the Winter Soldier had his efforts concentrated on one man whom we unfortunately were unable to eliminate. The Winter Soldier almost lost his metal arm during the fight so he's pretty beat up on the train ride back to base. I lookup at him and he's staring at the floor of the train car. Unbuckling myself, I stand up and carefully walk over to him and examine his arm. The train lurches and I stumble and fall onto the floor. I start to get up and see a hand extended my way. Hesitantly grabbing it, I pull myself up and I'm face to face with the soldier. I pull away quickly and sit back down on the other side.

"I'm sorry." He said, almost to quiet for me to hear. "I know I'm a monster. I'm really sorry"

I refused to answer him and kept staring at my hands. I had no reason to respond to him and I had too much on my mind to deal with anything else. Neither of us spoke for the rest of the ride.

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I walked slowly into the building dreading the rest of the day. I hadn't made it to my room before I was confronted by my master.

He walked up behind me and spoke in a low voice, "You know you're beautiful when you're tired."

I flinched at the sound of his voice and his cold breath on my ear.

He continued, "I have another assignment for you dear. But you must get cleaned up first." He kissed my cheek and left me to get ready. This was the last thing I wanted to do, I'd rather go back in that awful machine than go with him. As I changed my clothes and freshened up I thought of the interaction between the soldier and I. I haven't seen him since we got back but I'm guessing they froze him already. After all they don't need him for special things like this. I was finally ready and walked out my door to be greeted immediately by my master. He grabbed my hand and pulled me away to his room, stopping outside the door. Suddenly I was up against the wall with his lips smashed against mine. He held my arms tightly behind my back and didn't let go.

He pulled away from me gasping and said, "You are the most divine creature in the world. No one compares to your beauty. You are perfect."

I closed my eyes, knowing what came next and felt myself dragged into a dark room and thrown onto a bed. I pulled my body up to the wall and repeatedly banged my head against it. I finally passed out.

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I woke up in the morning on the floor with a pounding headache and freezing cold. I was confused until I remembered what happened last night and I could only assume he had thrown me on the ground during the night. I wrapped a blanket around my body and pulled my knees up to my chest quietly weeping for my innocence and mourning the monster they had made me. I came back to reality when I was pulled from the ground and told to get dressed in the clothes thrown at me. All of a sudden he was gone and I was left alone again. I got dressed and was led to the room with that dreaded machine. I could only hope they would make me forget what happened last night. I slowly limped to the chair in pain and sat down. The scientists bound my body again an I felt myself leaning backwards. The round contraption came down over my head and I felt more pain then ever before. I don't know how long it lasted for but when they were done they stood me up in the other chamber. Soon I felt cold air mingling with my pain and wished for the day I could finally die. The day this living death would be over and I would beat peace.