Warblers Pride Oneshots

June 15: Crush [Huntbastian]

CW: mention of past abuse/trauma

It was student evaluation days, where they were watched by all staff and, well, evaluated. If anything was off, they'd have a meeting with a staff member or the Dean, depending on what it was.

"Clarington," Sebastian said quietly as they left breakfast, ready to head to their first classes. Which was out of place on its own; he'd ignored Hunter since the day he transferred.

Hunter stopped, turning. "Hm?"

Sebastian walked right up to him, the closest they'd ever been, reaching up to fix Hunter's collar and tie.

"It was messed up," he explained quietly as he moved back away, continuing on to his class.

Hunter watched him leave, heart thumping.

"Oh my god. You like him."

It was Jeff who had spoken, but when he turned, all their friends were staring at him. His face went bright red as he sped off to his class, not saying anything.

—

Every time Hunter tried to focus, all he could think of was Sebastian right up in front of him, face focused, close enough to see the yellow in his green eyes, and feel his soft hands brush against his neck.

After classes, he was pulled to the Dean's office, immediately knowing what it was.

"This about me acting kind of spacey and odd all day, isn't it?" he asked, cheeks pink.

"Yes." He seemed to relax. "Your blush gives me hope that you're alright."

Hunter nodded. "I'm perfectly fine. Just, I never thought the guy I was crushing on could even stand me, but this morning he fixed my tie, so I've been really distracted trying to process it."

The Dean smiled. "I won't keep you any longer, then. I'm glad you're alright, and I wish you the best of luck."

He returned a shy grin. "Thank you, sir."

—

Suddenly, wearing the uniform seemed to have gotten really difficult for Hunter. Every time his uniform was messed up or missing a piece, he'd joke that he was relaxing after so long at military academy, and everyone pretended that they didn't know it was because Sebastian would always fix it for him.

Sebastian was hard to figure out. He was still quiet around Hunter, but he didn't avoid him anymore. He acted like nothing was happening.

"Sebastian," Jeff spoke up one day, figuring it was worth a shot, "are you dating anyone? We've never really discussed it, but you always dip out of conversations about relationships."

Hunter shot Jeff a what-the-fuck look that Sebastian didn't notice. "Not currently, no."

"Currently?"

"I used to be."

Jeff perked up. "Really?"

"Mm."

"What happened?"

"We broke up."

"Oh, did something happen? Or did you just grow apart?"

Sebastian paused. "You could say something happened, yeah," he said, voice a touch quieter than usual.

"Something... bad?" Jeff asked carefully, clearly knowing he should stop, but also dying to find out more about Sebastian's personal life.

"You could say that," he repeated, not telling Jeff off.

"Is that why you get quiet when relationships come up in conversation?" Nick asked, since he hadn't told them to stop asking questions.

He nodded.

"Are you interested in a new relationship?" Jeff asked. Hunter held his breath, not sure he wanted to hear the answer.

"Interested, hypothetically, yeah. I've thought about it a bit. I think, with the right person, I could try it out again."

"Is there anyone you're interested in, that you think could be the right person?" Jeff asked, knowing he was pushing it.

"I've thought about it," he repeated, still quiet.

"I realize, we talk about this so little that we don't even know, who are you attracted to? Like, in terms of gender and stuff?"

"Mostly men. I've found some nonbinary people attractive, but no women. So far, at least."

Hunter's heart thumped weakly, and he tried to keep his expression neutral, but it was hard. He had a shot.

"When's the last time you dated someone?" Jeff continued, waiting for the moment he was told to stop.

"It ended just before I transferred here."

"Oh, was long-distance not going to work?"

Sebastian shook his head. "Not quite. He was mad I was transferring. Then I transferred here later than planned and had to play catch-up."

"Why later?"

"I had a brief trip to the ER between my old school and this one."

They all went quiet. Nick cautiously asked, "Is that related to him getting mad?"

"Yes. And to why I was transferring in the first place."

"Do you want us to stop?" Jeff blurted out. "Just— we— well, I— am asking a lot of questions, and I don't want to make you uncomfortable, and usually you'd have told me to stop, but you haven't."

Sebastian shrugged. "I don't mind. You can stop or keep asking questions. If I don't want to answer one or want you to stop asking entirely, I'll tell you that. But now, you're welcome to keep asking."

"Okay. Is that why you usually go quiet whenever relationships come up?"

"Yes."

"Just... Making sure I'm understanding this correctly... He hurt you?" Thad asked quietly.

Sebastian nodded soundlessly.

"The person you've thought about maybe trying a relationship with... Do you trust that they won't hurt you? Like, even if you logically know they wouldn't, do you unconsciously trust them?"

"Logically, I know they'd never hurt me. Consciously, I trust them. Unconsciously, I mostly trust them. But that's with our current relationship. And I still know that I'll flinch if they move too fast or freeze if they raise their voice. But that has nothing to do with them. I just hope they can understand that."

"They have no excuse not to," Hunter found himself saying, Sebastian looking up at him. "Trauma can't be controlled, nor does it always adhere to logic. If they want to lessen your negative responses to them moving suddenly or raising their voice, then they should stop moving suddenly and raising their voice."

For the first time— that anyone had seen, that is— Sebastian smiled at him. A soft, genuine smile.

He felt like melting.