heartbeats. | Taehyung

Chapter one

C h a p t e r   o n e.

You wrapped your lips around the thin wineglass and you were able to chunk the alcohol down in one swoop. It has become pretty easy for you to do that, you couldn't even feel tipsy anymore from all the sweet wine you had over the many nights or evenings. Weekends, nights and evenings were the worst part of the day. Your thoughts were running wild at these times and it felt like it was so much harder to try not to cry. You haven't been at work either the past year, your apartment has been a mess since then as well. You just existed and breathed, anything else just didn't feel right. Since that day, you haven't been able to improve or anything else. Sure you went to a café at times but since you met your old friends there, it was just another place you started to avoid. You put the wineglass on the table, alongside another few glasses that had red stains of old wine on the bottom of the glass. It had dried over the night and you still had enough sense in you not to put the wine in a used glass with dregs sitting at the bottom. You thanked god for still having somehow a clear mind in some situations.

Chocolate Bars were laying on the table as well and the wrappings were also allocated wildly on the floor. Your apartment was rather small and heavy orange curtains that reached to the ground were closed, on very large windows. Through the sides of the curtains you were able to see that the weather has been very nice today, but that just puts you in an even worse mood. The last time you went out on a nice day, the sun was so bright it almost burned your eyes out of your eye sockets. Usually eyes get used to the bright sun but somehow your eyes just couldn't, probably because you've stayed inside with closed curtains for such a long time. So very quickly and no second thought you decided to go inside again, closing the curtain in a rush and dropping yourself on the orange couch.

Your eyes wandered to the couch you were lying on, and you let your hand slowly slide over the smooth and soft fabric of the couch to remember and bring back small moments you have forgotten a long time ago. He liked that color so much, you fought over whether to buy it or not because you wanted a softer color for a couch, to go better with the already orange curtains. But you gave in once he convinced you at least to try it. And the moment the couch stood in the living room you hated yourself for not believing in his taste for a second. He was really good at things like this, that was probably why so many celebrities and so many businesses hired him for ideas of their apartments. He could grow ideas for the most elegant people with less furniture and more architectural ideas. Or the people that wanted to feel more home and coziness, like he did with our apartment. He kept it so natural, cozy and also a little fun to keep up a good mood with fresh colors. He always wanted to get home and feel some sort of happiness when he or you got home from a busy workday.

Suddenly the bell of the apartment shot you up from your couch and you were staring at the door at the other end of the hallway. Within just a few seconds your brain was looking for the person that could stand behind that door now. Even your fiancé was an option in your head and probably some sort of hope in your disparate situation too. You hadn't been ordering anything and you for sure weren't expecting anyone. Slowly you moved away from your couch and took very careful steps through the wrappings, tissues and bottles of wine, as well as a few empty cornflakes boxes.

It knocked.

"Hey, Y/N." a male voice that sounded very familiar made you stop in your tracks. "It's us. Jimin and Hoseok" You looked around and saw the entire mess. You couldn't let them see, that was you first thought. But your second thought kicked right in, you couldn't care any less. You were mourning, of course you and your apartment were a mess.

"Please leave."  you said a little louder, trying to have some firmness in your voice to pretend you haven't been crying since hours once again.

"We haven't seen you in so long Y/N, please let us check up on you." Hoseok was the one to speak now and it was a little weird to hear him talk so serious and concerned. Somehow it didn't fit him.