*A/N* Hello! Okay, this chapter took longer than I wanted it to, but I really wanted to make sure I got it right. This chapter has A LOT of trigger warnings, so please read through and do not continue if you are triggered by anything here: sexual assault and abuse, pedophilia, parent/child incest, abuse of all kinds, rape (more on a philosophical level than an actual explicit description of the event but its definitely still there), sexual content, PTSD. Let me know if you see any others and I will add them to the list. I wouldn't really say that this is a cnc moment either, so just be cautious. This is a really rough bit of the story, but if you are triggered by anything there, I promise that we are getting to the fluff soon. My plan is for 1, MAYBE 2, more chapters after this and then we'll get to Elijah finally being rescued and finish the story off eventually. Sorry that this took so long, please enjoy and stay safe!
In Elijah's Mind
"...he would never do what Mikael has done..." the words echoed around in Klaus' head as he and his family once more filed their way out of the dark room and back into the blindingly white corridor to follow Esther's trail of breadcrumbs. Seeing the memories over again from a third-party perspective brought them into a new light for him, gave him an insight into how his siblings saw him. To say that is was haunting would be an understatement, the look in his eyes as he had plunged the dagger into the chest of his most beloved brother, his taunts as he had chased Rebekah through the graveyard, his smile as he had shut down Elijah's happiness yet again. They were all qualities that he had only seen on their father, someone who he had considered for centuries to be the greatest of evils. Even now, with the way that Marcel now wouldn't quite meet his gaze, the way that Rebekah was keeping her distance from him as they walked down the hallway, it all added up to this horrible visage of a monster that he hadn't quite realized he had become.
It ran rampant through his head, he tried to puzzle it out, to find a way around it, searching for a way that he was different from Mikael. Just moments ago, it had seemed there were plenty, but now, it felt like he was left with tattered threads of the illusion he had made up for himself. Klaus tried again and again, his mind unable to accept it. Mikael had hurt him as a child, the hybrid had never done that... but no, he had abandoned Marcel so young, left lots of the child's raising up to his noble brother and then torn the two apart and left them alone all over again. But... Mikael had kidnapped Elijah, held him captive for almost a century, he hadn't done that... hadn't he though? Had he not dragged his older brother around the world, threatening both him and their siblings with daggers and coffins if they should leave or betray him?
So the question remained, how was he different from Mikael. What was the deciding factor when it came to who Elijah chose to follow? What exactly had their father done?
~~~~~
Elijah could feel their eyes on him as they walked towards the next open door, they were searching for answers, but he didn't want to give any. He didn't want them to know, they were so much happier without it, it would ruin everything if Esther showed them, everything that they had fought so hard for. Maybe it was ridiculous to hope that his family could ever be truly happy, but even if it was a dream, it was a nice one, and it was hard to let it go. That was all he had ever wanted, just for them to be happy.
Upon entering the next room, Rebekah felt choked, small, and cramped, and suffocated, like she could never quite get enough air. That feeling in the pit of her stomach had grown and grown into a cold weight that she couldn't shake off. Something nagged at the back of her mind, telling her to turn back, to keep pretending all the clues away, to ignore all the warnings signs, to disregard the questions that were popping up all around her. But she couldn't, she had to know.
Words could never have accurately described the way that the entire world seemed to stop and stare as the memory began to play out before them. The very air in the room seemed to go still and quiet, with rapt attention as they all made their way into the room and fell silent. The entire universe outside of this moment disappeared, not even her siblings were there. It was just her. Glassy eyes watched a memory she had been replaying over and over in her head as the first few ancient tears rolled down her cheeks from a trauma she hadn't even realized she had been repressing.
*A/N* Okay, sorry for interrupting, I know it ruins the mood, just wanted to explain that I'm doing this memory more like a flashback just because it's easier to write. So, all the Mikaelsons can still see what Esther is showing them, I'm just going to write it differently. Okay, that's it, sorry, this is your last trigger warning, if you are safe to do so, please continue.
Memory
Elijah POV
When Niklaus' crying erupted from our parents' bedroom, I was running before I could think, before I could listen to Kol pleading for me to stay, before I could realize that I had let go of Rebekah's hand. I think that was the moment, the tipping point, the first time that I left everything behind to run in and protect one of them, despite knowing that it would make everything so much worse. It was lonely and broken in a way that words could never describe, the fact that even if I had known what would happen when I set foot through that door, I would have done it anyways.
My body moved on autopilot, barging into the room, picking Niklaus off the floor, pushing him out of the room and away from Mikael, blocking the way so that he could escape. And for a moment, everything was alright, it was peacefully quiet and blissfully numb. Time moved in slow motion as I watched my younger brother run away to find a freedom that I never did. I moved through molasses as Mikael grabbed my arm and stopped me from following. My vision blurred and my breath held no air as my father shut the bedroom door and pulled me towards the bed.
His hands were rough, tearing my clothes, gripping my wrists until they bruised a deep purple. A dirty cloth was forced passed my teeth until I gagged, another strip of fabric was wrapped over my eyes and tightly tied at the back of my head, my hands were fastened to the headboard with rope that dug into my skin. Not a second thought was given for it being my first time, and mercy was a dream that I had long woken up from. As much as I struggled, blindly kicking out at him and trying to scream for help, it wasn't anywhere near enough to dissuade Mikael.
Blood ran between my legs and onto the sheets as I was torn apart from the inside out. A sweaty hand was clamped over my mouth, preventing me from calling out to my family, who I could hear right on the other side of the door. The other was wrapped tightly around my throat, choking me until my head was fuzzy, and I hoped that I might fall unconscious. My entire body hurt, inside and out, my mind screamed from the violation, my organs cried from the assault, my muscles ached from the abuse.
It felt like it went on for hours, over and over, never-ending, every second worse than the last. In reality, it went on for so much longer than that, years, every second of my life, awake and asleep. It was a pain that never quite went away, a haunting agony, a phantom that nobody else could see. The worst part was when it ended, because I didn't know it right then, but it was never really over. Having to leave that room and get up from that bed, trembling, dried blood all down my thighs, bruises in the shape of his hands marking my skin all over, tear tracks tracing their way down my face, being split down the middle all over again as my body left but my mind never did.
*A/N* Okay, that's it, sorry this took so long to be uploaded, I had a super packed week. I hope everyone is okay, we are almost through the bad parts, hang in there. Thanks for reading, I will hopefully see you next week if I can get a chapter out. Congratulations to anyone that has summer break, that is coming up quite soon. I am almost finished my exams, so I should have more time to write soon, I have one tomorrow morning and then one more at the end of the week, wish me luck! Bye!
1555 words
YOU ARE READING
You Don't Know What I'd Do For You (Love you like oxygen)
FanfictionDisclaimer: I don't own the fandom or characters, just the plot. Basically Elijah is captured by witches and once the rest of the Mikaelsons find him they are let in on some carefully kept secrets of his. I suck at summaries and this book is kind o...
