12 | Forget Therapy, These Pills Will Do

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"I don't want to know about them," I immediately tell Vance, even though I found this entire situation strange.

He supposedly knew my biological parents and then he just happens to show up in town to investigate a case?

How did he even know where I was?

Had he kept track of me over the years? If so, then why?

And why didn't he say anything that day at the bulletin board? Gave any indication that he knew who I was?

"They gave me up because they didn't want me. I don't want anything to do with them."

Vance smiles at me, but it doesn't reach his eyes. "What exactly do you know about them, Charly?"

I release a frustrated breath, not wanting to talk about them, but Vance clearly wasn't letting go of the subject.

"I know that they gave me up after I was born and then Claire adopted me even though her parents didn't want her to."

"They gave you up to protect you, Charly. They didn't have much of a choice."

What?

Vance's phone beeps with a message and he checks the screen. "Look kid, I want to explain everything to you, but I need to go."

I stared at him, still trying to process what he said.

He walked back to the door but paused before stepping outside. "I made a promise to your parents, Charly. A promise to always protect you. And I will."

The door clicked shut behind him.

I sank onto my bed, my thoughts spinning like a whirlwind.

Protect me?

What did I need protecting from?

The questions piled on top of each other until my phone buzzed, jolting me from my thoughts.

I stared at the reminder to take my antidepressants, Jacey's warning ringing in my ears.

Stop drinking the pills, Charly.

I gripped the phone tighter, my pulse racing.

Could I trust him? Jacey was the only one who claimed I wasn't depressed as a kid and there was concrete evidence that we were good friends back then.

But what if he was wrong? What if he was lying?

I swallowed hard, pushing the doubts aside.

For as long as I could remember, Claire, Elvin, Willa, Dr. Mallory—they all insisted I needed the pills. They claimed I had depression but never wanted to talk about it.

And Jacey did.

I got up, my legs shaky, and walked to the bathroom. I opened the medicine cabinet and stared at the orange pill bottle.

My fingers tightened around it.

Then, before I could second-guess myself, I unscrewed the cap and dumped the pills into the toilet.

The sound of the flush echoed in the small room, but it did nothing to quiet the flurry of questions inside me.

I leaned against the sink, my mind drifting back to the accident that had claimed my memory.

It was my twelfth birthday. Claire said I'd fallen.

The impact had caused severe head trauma, and when I woke up in the hospital the next day, everything was different.

The memories of my life before the fall were just...gone.

I thought about the photos I found, about Jacey and the little girl I couldn't remember and why Claire never told me.

Nothing made sense.

No one ever told me anything about my childhood, and now suddenly Vance and Jacey were both eager to fill me in on the blanks.

Why now all of a sudden?

If Claire was lying about the pills and possibly my childhood, what else could she be lying about?

↟↟↟

I tried calling Claire again on my way to school the next morning, but she was still not answering.

Was she okay?

She usually called when she was out of town for a client, but the way we left things before she left was different this time.

I left her a message asking her to call me back and put my phone away.

I hadn't taken three sets of antidepressants, and I think my body was starting to remind me. My head throbbed, my stomach churned, and every muscle felt like ti weighed twice as much.

Was it withdraw? Or was it the freezing river water I'd jumped into a few days ago finally catching up to me?

I'd taken some cold medicine this morning, just in case. But in the back of my mind, I couldn't help hearing a small, paranoid voice.

It's the depression.

You need the pills, Charly.

I shook my head and pushed the thoughts away. Could skipping one day's worth of pills really hit me this fast?

The morning blurred together, my head pounding as I slogged through each class.

I had brought along some of the photos I found to show Fin and confront Jacey if I saw him at school, but he was nowhere to be found and I would only see Fin during the last two periods.

By the time lunch rolled around, I could barely keep my eyes open. The fluorescent lights in the cafeteria felt too bright and the chatter of students sounded distant, like I was underwater.

My throat burned and my heart pounded in my chest.

I needed air.

I slipped out of the cafeteria, clutching my bag against my side as I made my way down the empty hallway. My vision wavered, the walls seeming to tilt.

I reached my locker and leaned against it, breathing heavily. The spinning in my head was worse now, and my bag slipped to the floor.

I pressed my hands to my eyes, trying to stop the dizzying swirl.

"Charly?"

The voice was faint at first, like it was coming from far away.

I opened my eyes but everything was blurry.

A figure moved toward me, but I could only make out his silhouette.

Jacey.

My knees buckled as the world tilted violently to one side.

"Charly!" His voice was clearer this time, more urgent. He was running now, his footsteps echoing closer.

Strong arms caught me just before I hit the ground. My body slumped against Jacey as I felt myself slipping away.

"Charly!" His voice faded, swallowed by the darkness.

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