Alexithymia

Unwavering Heart

How are you? It's been almost a month since you left me, and yet, I still miss you deeply. Each passing day, it becomes harder and harder to act like everything is fine without you by my side. The truth is, I think about you constantly, and perhaps, I've become consumed by my longing for you. It's difficult to look at other people because all I see is you, even if they don't resemble you physically.

I miss you more than words can express, and a part of me wishes you would come back, but I know deep down that it's not what you want. If you did want to return, you would have done so already. I can't help but feel pathetic, clinging to the hope that your love for me might resurface, and that we could go back to the way things were. It's clear now that I was mistaken, and I can't help but laugh at my foolishness.

Despite what happened between us, I hope you know that I never betrayed you, regardless of what others may say. I truly hope you believe this, although I understand why you might struggle to trust my words. They claim to have "proof" against me, but I know that the timing and the accounts they refer to are not accurate. Even if I were to explain myself, it seems unlikely that you would believe me. It's disheartening, but I want you to know that my love for you remains steadfast, despite everything you've said.

I want to assure you that I never spoke ill of you to anyone, including Gab. Our chat history would attest to the truth of my words. But regardless of the truth, I know you are doing better than I am. You have always been better at handling difficult situations, haven't you? I try to distract myself from the pain, but eventually, the reality sets in, and I'm left with the harsh truth that there is no one waiting for me, no one to tell me they love me like you once did.

I miss you immensely, and I genuinely hope you're doing well and taking care of yourself. Even though we may be apart, my love for you remains unwavering.