Until We Meet Again

16.

I haven't heard from Nick for a few days now.

I've tried to text him, DM him on instagram, and I've even called him.

Yesterday morning, I showed up to his mom's house.

No one was there so I went home.

He isn't picking up, and isn't giving any signs of life.

I have no idea what happened, at first, I thought he'd fallen asleep. But then he saw my text and didn't reply.

After that, I sent another text, he saw it and I thought he was just busy.

But then, the next morning, I woke up to no message and I knew something was wrong.

I thought he'd gotten mad at me for not replying to him for an entire day, but Nick wouldn't ignore me for that.

I'd be lying if I told you this situation didn't make me extremely anxious.

I check Nick's instagram, and see he's posted a story, and it takes all the strength in me to not click on it.

I don't know what's going on, he seemed so happy to have me back on monday morning, and then just like that, he was gone.

It feels weird.

My mental health has gotten way better over the years, but right now, I am assuming that he regrets the night we spent together. And it's making me spiral.

I have no one to talk to, and I don't want my friends to see me as a bad person, so I didn't tell them about the night I spent with Nick.

Maybe I should have.

Maybe if I did, I wouldn't be alone in my apartment crying my eyes out.

Tao would kill me, Isaac would just be confused, Elle would probably understand, but then she'd tell Tao.

Tori would just shrug it off and tell me it's going to be okay.

I wish Nick would just tell me what happened so I could know the reason I'm crying.

My eyes are red from crying so much and my heart hurts.

This is why I wouldn't let him back in.

Once you're in love with Nick Nelson there's absolutely no way out.

He engulfs you in so much love, and makes you feel like out of every single human in the world, you're the only one that matters.

When he looks at you, you can practically see every emotion through his eyes, and that used to make me feel so good.

Nick is also very well spoken, and when he gets mad, which doesn't happen much, he knows exactly what words to use in order to win the argument.

He's fun, and he's fierce, and he completes me in a way nobody is ever going to.

I cannot let him go again.

I grab my phone and check his Instagram story.

I'm met with a picture of a pint of beer, and then a selfie with a silly filter on, Sai and Tara appearing on the picture.

He likes doing that.

He's back in the pub we met at the last time, and I sigh, debating on going.

If I go, his friends are going to know something's going on between the both of us again.

Our town is a little one, and Sai cannot keep his mouth shut, I know the news would spread like a disease.

And I'm not sure I want that to happen. James would turn red with rage.