𝑬𝒏𝒄𝒉𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝑯𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒕𝒔 :: &𝐓𝐄𝐀𝐌 𝟎𝐓𝟗 [ ONGOING ]

• Chapter 02 •

[ 3 DAYS LEFT BEFORE &Audition Finale ]

⎯⎯ ୨ CLEMENTINE'S ୧ ⎯⎯

Things have been incredibly stressful and intense over the past three weeks due to a strict schedule of filming, recording, sports practice, and, of course, practicing for the forthcoming performance that I have in three days. Don't get me wrong, I'm more than delighted and excited to be included in the official debut lineup. I mean who would not be happy--considering how competitive the industry is, right?

However.....

I still can't stop myself from drowning in a negative train of thought about whether or not this decision, path, or choice is the finest one I've made or if it's one of those doomed to fail. I recognize, and I can see right thru me. I know I can do it and that I am capable of what I am going to undertake. After all, the person who knows you best is you, right?

I guess it's simply that being added to a bunch of people who have joined and fought for a spot just to be in the final lineup while my slot was given like that doesn't sit right with me...........or was it just my conscience talking-we'll see about that.

Anyway, my heart has been pounding so quickly as I anticipate what will happen in three days. The order of events of what will happen on the day has been explained to me by Bang PD and the rest of the staff (except the producers who are in the program). I was also advised that I needed to arrive early for my final rehearsal on stage since they don't want anyone else to see me because if they do, it won't be a surprise anymore. In the middle of everything, I consider myself extremely fortunate to have such supportive friends and family.

For the past three weeks, I've been overwhelmed with love and support from my family in Japan and in Norway, as well as my friends who have grown to become a family to me here in South Korea. Word spread quickly, and rumours about my probable debut in the K-pop industry began to circulate-including a rumoured debut date. Fortunately, the information about my debut date is far from the true date and my soon-to-be reality. Though, I must add, the HYBE Label did not disapprove that rumour which has left me perplexed as to why they did not, but oh well(🤷‍♀️)

It could be their tactic not to let fans have the urge to find out about the real date and not make the fans think that there could be something going on behind their backs.

Except for the individuals I spoke with at the meeting weeks ago and my adored younger cousin, ENHYPEN's Kiera, no one knows that I will be making my debut with the final lineup of men from &Audition in three days. Everything I've been doing this month has been framed by the company as "preparation for my solo debut" in two months. That is by far more effective in hiding what we know and allows us to not get pressured by everyone in revealing what we are hiding currently. I already have a lot of stress in my life, and I don't want anyone else to add to it.