Cartman Ships (Oneshots)

Tolkman (Tolkien/Cartman)

Tolkien's POV:

It's my sleepover with both mine and Stan's friend group and I'm sitting quietly, watching the movie. "Ugh this is soooo boring!" I hear Clyde groan, "Let's play something fun, like spin the bottle." Everyone looks at him and they nod to one another, apart from me and Cartman. "Yo dude, that's kinda faggy." Cartman says, laughing to himself a bit. "Stop being a pussy and play, you too Tolkien." Stan replies. "AY, I'M NOT A PUSSY!" He shouts back. I shrug my shoulders and grab my empty sprite bottle. "Come on then." I say before sitting down on the floor. Everyone joins me and we form a circle. Stan first starts with the bottle and it lands on Craig. We continue playing and then the bottle is passed to me. I hesitantly spin it, fearing on who it might land on.

I've never kissed a boy before. I've identified myself as straight for as long as I can remember, but I'll admit, there have been times where I've thought to myself that I could possibly be attracted to men and be bisexual. Back in fourth grade, I had a tiny crush on Kyle Brofloski, but I didn't really think of it much because I lost feelings not long after.

The bottle lands on Cartman.

My eyes widen, why him of all people? He stares at me, nervous. I expected him to make a snarky remark or say something rude, but all he does is sit there, fiddling with his thumbs. "Hurry up and do it!" I hear Clyde say, giggling a bit. "Rules are rules, so fine." I reply. A red tint spreads across Cartman's cheeks and he darts his eyes away from my gaze. I crawl over to him and stare into his colourful eyes. I blush a little, I hadn't really ever noticed how cute he was. I close my eyes and connect lips with him, grabbing him by the waist. He also closes his eyes and we immediately break out into a make out session. I bite his lower lip and slip my tongue into his mouth. After about two minutes of slobbery kisses, we break the connection. We just sit there, surprised about what had just happened, before smiling at one another. "Dude you're supposed to kiss, what the fuck was that?" Kyle asks stunned. Cartman turns his head to him and shrugs. We both sit back in our seats and continue playing. Throughout the whole game we both keep glancing at each other and smiling.

Maybe he isn't as bad as I thought.

A/N: I know that this is a really controversial and extremely rare ship since a lot of people think Cartman is racist, but I don't think that and I think he's just a really stereotypical person. One way to prove this is the fact that chef was the only adult he respected and he was black. Anyways, I hope this was okay<333

427 words not including A/N'S