A Stubborn Love (My Not-So-Ordinary Love Story)

ELEVEN: JUST AN AFFAIR

MAHAL ko na sya. 

Mahal na mahal....

Sobrang mahal na feeling ko kaya kong mag submit sa kanya, that with him I am willing to be dominated.

Sobrang mahal na I think I can throw away all of my personal values and convictions just for him.

Kaya kung mas matagal, mas mahirap...mas matagal, mas masakit...mas matagal baka di ko na kaya...

I need to do this...I have to...habang kaya ko pa.... 

 -

-

-

My heart is beating so fast...hands are sweating...butterflies in my stomach...

Kalma ka lang Annie...kaya mo yan...

"Hi there sexy!" sabay yakap sa kanya ni Paul Jake mula sa likuran.

Humalik pa ito sa leeg nya na nagdulot na naman ng kilig sa puso nya.

"Hah?! anu ba yun?!"

"Juicemio Paul Jake ginulat mo naman ako...", pabuntong hiningang sabi ni Annie.

"Why? what are you thinking ba?", I saw you kanina na parang tulala, di mo nga ako napansin na dumating...you didn't even reply sa text message ko kanina kung sabay ba tayo papasok..." may halong tampong sabi ni Paul Jake.

"PJ we need to talk.", seryosong sabi ko. 

Di ako makatingin ng direcho sa kanya....baka pag tumingin ako sa kanya eh malusaw na naman lahat ng lakas ng loob ko at di ko masabi kung anong dapat kong sabihin.

"Hey, why so serious? May problema ba?", worried na tanong ni Paul Jake.

I need to gather all my strength this time. I have to tell him what I've been thinking since day one.

-

one...

-

two...

-

three...

-

"We need to stop this PJ.",  I told him in a firm voice.

"Stop what?", confused na tanong ni Paul Jake

"This affair ." , nakayuko kong sabi. 

Ayokong tumingala dahil ayokong makita nya ang mga luhang nagsisimula ng tumulo sa mga mata ko.

"A-annie...please...", mahinang sabi ni Paul Jake na nakaupo na ngayon sa harapan ko.

Tama. all this time...all we have is just an AFFAIR.

An illicit relationship.

Diba affair ang tawag sa isang "relationship" na hindi legal? 

FYI. Binata si Paul Jake at lalo namang dalaga ako.

But both of us have our own romantic relationship with someone else....

May boyfriend ako...si James. Ours is not a serious one...but still boyfriend ko pa din sya.

We've been together for a couple of months palang bago naging kame ni Paul Jake. We seldom see each other kasi malayo ang place nya and he is also working.

Honestly I don't feel any love for James anymore...matagal na...maybe we really didn't love each other...pero wala lang kameng chance to formally break up with each other.