Mine ~ Chris Sturniolo

Part 3

Ever since that day, I get nervous at the single touch from Chris. We cuddle here and there but I don't think he feels the same way. We never kissed again after that. I really wanted to but I didn't want to force anything on him. I mean it's just a little crush right? Chris has 20 000 girls lining up on his front door waiting to be with him. I literally have no one besides creepy Xavier Anders. He's this creep who tried to kidnap me last year. Yes I mean kidnap. Real creep he is.

And besides, I don't have time for whatever 'feelings' I have. 

Nick walked into my room as I was brushing my hair. "What up bitch," he announced his presence by screaming like the damn hooligan he is. "Hello Nick." I wasn't in the mood for his shit today. I wasn't in the best mood to be honest. My dad came home early yesterday, drunk as always, and hit me again.

I got up to hug Nick but then everything just felt as if it was spinning. The world was turning black in a quick span of time. Was this the end? My knees grew weak, causing my to crumble to the floor. The last thing I heard was Nick's muffled and concerned voice. "Ana?" "Are you okay?" "No Ana, don't do this to me."

"You're a disgrace to my family name!" he yelled from the top of his drunk lungs. He brought his hand up again, harshly connecting it wish my face. That's the first time he ever hit me in my face. Normally he would punch my stomach of cut my legs.

He walked over to the kitchen and I didn't think to move. The pain on my face was excruciating. Blood dripped off my face as a wiped it. I winced at the pain. He came back with a knife a grabbed my ankles. He slit them over and over again. Screams of hurt and pain emerged from my mouth. The only thing he could do is laugh as he cut me.

He was laughing, seriously? I'm here going through so much pain and hurt and the only thing he can do is laugh? Sometimes I wish I never grew up with a father. I know it sounds crazy but he changed the person that I was. I really do miss the times when he was sane.

I woke up in a cold sweat. My heart beat fast and breathe hitched. My body shot up as I breathed as if I had just run a marathon. I choked on the air in my lungs for a few times before taking deep breathes. In, for 4 seconds. Hold for 4 seconds. Out for 4 seconds. I repeated this a few more times and looked to the side of me to see Nick with tears in his eyes.

"Ana." He said, grabbing ahold of me, embracing me in a tight hug. "What just happened?" I was unsure of the current situation and the events 5 minutes before. Well 20 minutes before. Nick explained that I passed out when I stood up to hug him. I had been unconscious for 20 minutes before waking up.

I started crying. I don't know why but I just did. This wasn't such a serious thing but everything else just wasn't right. My mother pasted away a few years ago, leaving me behind to be abused and hurt by a grown man. He always says that I'm just a reminder on the one thing he wasted his whole life on, and that's why she hates me. I still haven't told Nick. I really think I do need to.

He wanted to hug me but accidentally grazed his hand over my ankles, causing me to wince out of excruciating pain. Nick knows that my volleyball season was over and that I'm not that clumsy to hurt myself in my room on accident. He looked into my eyes and looked away before rolling up my pants to see the cuts.

My heart dropped in horror as he looked at them. He stared at my scars and then back at me. "Are you...harming yourself again?" Throughout summer last year, my insecurities got so bad that I started self harming and Nick knows it was really bad. My heart broke as he said those words. "No." I said, my voice breaking and eyes filling with tears.

"Ana," he began, "Whatever is going on, you can talk to me about it." His reassuring voice calmed me down very quickly. Tears rolled down my eyes and I couldn't bear to look at his upset face any longer. "What's going on, Ana?" I sobbed with my head in my hands. He held my in a tight grasp and stroked my hair. "Nick. It's not good here at home." I found the strength to continue on, "Everyday when I come home from school my dad abuses me. He gets all drunk and he says that everything about me just reminds him of my mother. I don't know how much longer I can take this."

My heart sunk below the surface. I hate to watch Nick get upset, it's the worst. "Oh my Ana," he sympathized and hugged me again. "It's okay, Ana,"

I don't wanna feel like I felt last night

Those lyrics played in my head as I thought about the night before. They're from one of my favorite songs, Escapism by RAYE and 070 Shake. I never want to experience such pain ever again. "Ana we need to do something about it." He said to me, "What can I do? He's my father and he's the one who provides for me." And that's right. HE was the one earning money for me to survive. Without him, I would have no money.

"Come home with me, Ana." Nick replied. I stood up and followed him home. As we walked I realized that Mary-Lou's car was in the driveway. We walked into the house and I immediately ran over to Mary-Lou and hugged her. She's always been my comfort person and an important mother figure to me ever since my mother passed away. When we were younger she would always take care of me when dad was getting out of hand. I'm so dearly grateful for her. Nick gave us a moment alone and went back to his bathroom to process all the information that I just delivered to him.

"My darling." She knew something was wrong because I never do this unless something isn't right. She hugged me back as I cried in her arms. "Dad." I said to her. She realized that I was talking about my dad. I told her about what was happening with my dad back in 9th grade already. She was the first person I ever really opened up to about it. Ever since then she promised that she would always be there if I needed her. I'm grateful that she never told the triplets. I know that they are her kids, and I am their friend but sometimes you just have to keep secrets from the people you love, even though it pains you.

She stroked my hair and brushed my hair out of my face. All I could do was cry. Everyone always judged me for crying so much but when it's you that's taking all the abuse people say otherwise. Mary-Lou comforted me in a way that other people couldn't. She's really the best.

I cried in her arms for a few minutes before letting go of her. She looked at me with so much hurt and admiration in her eyes and kissed my forehead. "You will be okay, Ana. But you need to promise me something, honey." I simply nodded my head, my throat hurt from crying so much so I didn't want to speak. "We need to do something about this now. It's been 5 years sweetheart." I nodded again, earning another love filled hug from Mary-Lou.

"Pack your bags and move in with me and the boys. Juliet as well. We have an extra room upstairs just next door to Nick's room. You can set up your own pretty room in there, okay?" I can't believe it. I'm actually moving into my best friend's house. "I can't tell you how much I appreciate you, Mary-Lou. I love you so much." I hugged her and she hugged me back. "I love you too, sweetheart." So I did it. 

thanks sm to everyone whose read my story i literally love all of you sm <3 next chapter in a few minutes  - i'll try uploading everyday but school is getting hectic so i'm a bit busy but i'll try for you guys :) 

<3 

kesia