No More DayDreaming [DISCONTINUED]

Visitor Hours

Aubrey leaned up against the railing, bouncing Terry's ball onto the floor, off the wall, and back to her. Terry was running back and forth, his eyes wide and mouth slobbering in excitement. Aubrey's eyes were heavy, and she was half asleep. Yesterday had been exhausting, but she wasn't able to sleep much. There were just too many thoughts in her head. She finally gave up trying to sleep at 6:30 am. Ratchet was surprised to see her up early on a weekend, but didn't question it. Now she was on he platform closest to Cliff, half heartedly playing with her dog. She sighed, catching the ball and letting it fall in her lap. The little terrier plopped on her leg and sighed with her. She scratched the top of his head lazily, and they both began to drift off to sleep...
•••
Aubrey woke when Terry jumped off her lap and the sound of someone entering the base. She stretched, yawning. Everything ached. She turned her head to see BumbleBee transform from his vehicle mode back to a bot. Rafael was climbing the latter, and headed towards her. She rubbed her eyes, standing to greet him with a soft smile. "Hey, Raf. You happen to know the time?" She asked with a dry throat. "I think it's around lunch time.." Raf shrugged. Aubrey forgot she was still in all her pajamas, and that her hair must be a mess. "Um..." Raf paused, he looked as though he was nervous to say something. "What's up? Everything ok?" Aubrey tilted her head. "Well... Kind of. I- I'm... You know who Blane is, right?" He asked quietly, looking down at his shoes. The name rang a bell.
"Blane the saxophone player?" She blinked. He hadn't been at school for a while... Some bad car accident. She had remember seeing it on the local news, and the band class had made him a get well card. "Yeah- him... He's, well, he's my cousin and Bee was gonna take me to visit him at the hospital and... I dunno, I just don't wanna go alone.. You know him so I thought..." Aubrey was surprised to hear that the two were related, but once she heard it, she could see the subtle similarities. "Don't worry, I'll go with you bud." She smiled, kneeling down. "You ok?" She asked in a concerned tone. "Yeah- yeah... We're just close, and I miss seeing him all the time." Raf shrugged. "I'm sorry, Raf... Let me get ready and I'll go with you guys." She stood up, patting his shoulder.

A few months before the autobots...

Aubrey fell on the couch, moaning in exhaustion. "Homework done?" Her dad asked with a small smile. "Yeah.. Finally... What's on?" She asked, looking up at the TV and snatching a chip out of her father's bowl. "Nothin' really." He shrugged, going through the channels. He stopped at the local news channel, and both their eyes went wide. A car was upside down in a ditch, flames licking the surrounding grass. Aubrey's father whistled in shock, and she leaned closer.
"A car accident occurred just moments ago, cause not yet determined. The truck that hit the smaller car has little damage, and I'm just now getting the driver is suspected of D.U.I. It seems the car had two passengers, a mother and her son... Oh... Oh no... Ladies and gentlemen I am getting news that one of the passengers- the driver- is dead. The other victim is still trapped in the car, badly wounded. Whether he will survive his injuries is still uncertain. The rescue workers are working frantically to remove him from the car before the flames reach the gas tank." The newsman was talking loudly into the mic, the wind seeming to drown out most of the noise.
"Jesus..." The two mumbled in unison. "That idiot..." Her dad shook her head as they showed the truck that had caused the accident. "Even in a small town like this people have to cause trouble." Aubrey growled. They both quieted down as the report continued. The camera was changed to the news anchors back in their building at the center of town. "We've received confirmation that the driver of the truck is from out of town. The two riders of the smaller car are locals here, the mother Delilah Thorn and her teenage son, Blane Thorn." The male anchor announced grimly. Aubrey pressed mute and her eyes went wide. The victim's pictures were posted up on the screen, the anchors' mouths moving without sound. "What?" Her dad asked, concerned. "He's in my band class." She gasped.
•••
"Visitor hours are done by 6, just be out by then." The nurse smiled as she left Raf and Aubrey at the door. Raf paused, taking a moment to sigh. "You alright?" Aubrey frowned. "Yeah- just... Just try to ignore his... Injuries. It's... Bad. So we're not supposed to mention it. Or... Or his mom..." Raf looked down at his shoes. Aubrey bit her lip, and placed a comforting hand on Raf's shoulder. "Don't worry, I won't mention any of it." She assured him. With a nod, Raf opened the door. Aubrey mentally prepared herself. She had no idea what injuries Blane had, only that he was taking a while to recover. She expected to see bandages and casts like in the movies, or maybe burns on his face. She even reminded herself on how to act around people with mental disorders or PTSD.
But when the door was fully open, she was taken aback. Blane didn't have bandages over his face and arms, no leg in a cast propped up by a sling. He didn't even have an I.V. in his arm. He had small cuts on his knuckles, and barely noticeable burns on his fingers and lower neck. She had to really look, but she could see faded lines that seemed like miner scars along his right jaw. But... Something was... Off. His face lit up when he saw Rafael, though, his bright hazel eyes shining under the bright hospital lights. "Hey, Raf. How ya' been?" He smiled weakly, moving to sit up slowly and lean up against a pillow. His voice was raspy, but sincere. Aubrey closed the door behind them, standing awkwardly at the entrance. Raf walked up to Blane happily, climbing onto the hospital bed. Her heart stopped and she took a sharp breath in as he jumped right where Blane's legs were underneath the blanket. She cringed slightly, waiting for Blane to cry out in pain.
But he did nothing. Raf was sitting on just the bed. Aubrey blinked. Blane wasn't sitting with his knees up, or criss-cross... Aubrey paled ever so slightly as it all clicked. In the car crash, Blane had lost his mother, and his legs. Her heart sunk, and her chest tensed. Raf, however, was unphased. "I've been alright." He smiled, sitting criss-cross on the bed. Blane motioned with his head toward Aubrey. "What, you replaced me as your tutor?" He jabbed playfully. "No! This is Aubrey. She's my friend." Raf turned around, motioning for Aubrey to come closer. Aubrey waved with an awkward smile, moving to sit down in a chair by the hospital bed. "I know her. You play clarinet, right? Second chair?" He smiled. "Heh, yeah. You're second saxophone, if I remember right." She was still a little shaken from realizing Blane was an amputee, and she prayed it didn't show in her voice. "Yeah. Hey- how did our last concert go? Do you know who got my solo?" He tilted his head, eyes brightening at the thought of the concert. Aubrey smiled. She hadn't thought anyone cared as much as she did about the concerts. "The concert went pretty well, actually. But the saxophone feature in Seafare Overture was kinda flimsy. As for the solo, Theo got it. He did really well, too." She grinned, remembering the loud applause the parents had given him after he sat down. "Awesome, awesome." Blane smiled with a nod, turning to Raf. "And your English test?" Blane raised an eyebrow. Raf looked down at the sheets, and both Aubrey and Blane leaned forward, ready for bad news.
"I..." He began, but perked up with a bright smile, "I got an 87%!!" He grinned. Blane lit up, matching Raf's expression and gave him a high five. "Alright!! Oh buddy I'm so proud of you! That's a huge improvement!" Blane laughed as Raf pulled out a folded piece of paper from his pocket and handed it to him. "It's all thanks to you." Rafael mumbled shyly. "I'm sorry to interrupt, but I've gotta ask- this little genius gets tutoring..?" Aubrey smiled as she saw the green 87 on the test. "Math, technology, history, science, you name it, he's got an A in it. But English is his one subject that takes a little more practice. And it was writing that he needed help on." Blane explained as Raf hopped down from the bed. "I'm going to the restroom, I'll be right back." He smiled, leaving the room. Aubrey watched as the door closed, realizing that the silence was becoming awkward faster than she could think of anything to say.
"I'm assuming you know what happened?" Blane said before she could think of a less... Touchy subject. "... Yeah. I'm- I'm really sorry for what happened.." Aubrey rubbed the back of her neck. Blane laughed, shaking his head. "I don't know why everyone says that. It makes no sense to me." He sighed. Aubrey was quiet, unsure how to respond. "It wasn't your fault, you've got nothing to apologize for." He smiled gently at her. "I-I'm sorry.." She mumbled with a smile.
"There it is again!" He laughed. Aubrey's ears were growing hot in embarrassment. Blane blinked, shaking his head. "Well now it's my turn to apologize. I'm sorry, that's not exactly what I should say to someone trying to be nice." He used his left hand to rub his temple. "No- no I get what you mean." Aubrey assured him. Blane eyed her over. "... Raf just has a knack for meeting nice people, doesn't he?" Blane chuckled. Aubrey chuckled with him, shrugging shyly. "He probably told you not to talk about the accident, or the injuries..." His smile faded a little. "You don't have to talk about anything you're not comfortable about. I'm... I'm just here to listen." Aubrey insisted. "That's the thing- no one wants to just listen. They just want me to forget about the fact that half of me isn't there but--... But how do you forget..? How do you forget when something that's always been there is just... Is just gone..?" Blane kept up his smile, until the last part, and Aubrey realized he wasn't talking just about his legs. "I-I can't answer that. I'm... I'm sorry." Aubrey bit her lip.
"Thats why, though. That's why they don't want to listen, because they don't know how to answer my questions and they think I'll be scared or upset. They're really afraid themselves, though. And hell, I can't really blame 'em, can I..?" He leaned back. Aubrey shifted in her seat uncomfortably. Blane blinked, rubbing his eyes. "Ah, Jesus... I'm sorry, they've got me on like, 20 meds at once. I get loopy sometimes..." Blane frowned with a sigh. "It's fine, really." Aubrey smiled sincerely.
Aubrey's shoulders eased in relief as Raf came inside again. "My mom just called, she wants me to come home. Oh- and she says hi." He frowned, obviously reluctant to leave. "Well tell her I say hi too, come here." Blane smiled, and Raf trotted up to give him a careful hug. Aubrey stood up. "See you at school..?" She tilted her head. "I should back in a week, actually. Make sure my locker is locked up tight in the band room for me? Theo likes to put his garbage in my locker sometimes, as a joke or something." He rolled his eyes with a smile. Aubrey chuckled. "Will do." She nodded, walking out with Raf. As he closed the door, he waved goodbye.
Outside, the sky had just begun to get the early pink clouds that came a while before the sunset. She and Raf filed into the backseat, buckling their seat belts. "How'd it go?" Bee whirred cheerfully. Aubrey turned to Raf to let him answer. She was surprised to see tears in his eyes. "Hey- what's wrong?" She asked with concern. Raf took off his glasses to wipe his eyes, but just started to sob. "Raf- Raf it's ok, he's going to be alright. He's- he's getting better." Aubrey brought Raf closer, rubbing his shoulder in comfort.
"I... I didn't know his legs were gone..! But... But I didn't want to say anything..!" Raf squeezed Aubrey, crying harder as Bee pulled away. Aubrey bit her lip, leaning over to hug Raf. "It's... It's ok, Raf. It'll be ok..." She muttered, her own eyes growing teary.

Back in the hospital room, with Blane...

I watched as the nurse turned the light off, saying goodnight. I felt sick at the thought of another night at the hospital, with its strange sounds and sterile smells... I couldn't get over how dumb I was, telling Aubrey all about how I thought the nurses felt. How... How I could never forget I lost my legs. She had just seemed so calm, and she was willing to listen, and the medications were numbing my thought process at the time. Yet I still feel like an idiot. I can't imagine how awkward she must've felt. Thank God Raf has good friends, otherwise she might've told the nurse and they would have been here, calling my dad and some therapist. I don't know why it's so hard for everyone to accept that I can be calm about losing my legs. They're all so worried about my legs. It's always, 'medication to numb the pain from the operation' and 'we'll have prosthetic legs as soon as they're made, custom, just for you'. They can't accept that I would have given up my legs, my arm, fingers, whatever, just to have her here. My mom. But instead, I'm left without her, or my legs.
No. No, it's too late for this... I need rest, I don't need to think about it... The more I sleep the faster I get back into routine. The faster I can... I can heal in the way I need to... I think.
I try to let my mind drift, to fall asleep. Through all the sadness and anger and pain, I still feel a little happy. Raf's visits always manage to lift my spirits. He's just so... So smart, and cheerful. The way he ran up, so excited to show me his test. He jumped on the bed not even knowing my legs weren't there. He was so excited, he hadn't even sat in the chair. He hadn't even stopped to think about how my legs should be right where jumped. I smiled as I started to fall asleep, welcoming the dark happily.
Until my heart stopped. I shot upright, breathing heavily, sweat beginning to bead on the back of my neck.
He hadn't known my legs were gone.
I hadn't told him, and he never knew because he always sat in the chair.
And he hadn't said anything, because he was afraid.
Just like everyone else...