Kissed by Fire: Cal Kestis

Chapter 22

Traveling through Dathomir felt like being constantly stuck in a dark tunnel, one you couldn't find the way out. Nightbrothers were at every turn of the way, ready to pounce and kill the two of them on sight thanks to the resident Nightsister survivor. Armed with bows and maces, it took almost everything out of Y/n to keep herself and Cal alive on the forsaken planet. It also didn't help that Y/n felt like her mind was being lowered into a thick vat of boiling oil every time she tried to have a conscious thought.

She was starting to understand what Cere had told her before she spoke with Cal. That Dathomir would cloud her mind and try to warp her thoughts. It was a dark place filled with dark and hateful emotions. She tried not to let the feeling overcome her, but with every turn of a corner, she found it harder to resist as they ran deeper into Dathomir's grasp.

Y/n didn't know what the dark side of the Force felt like, but if she had to guess, it had to be this monstrous feeling inside of her. She found herself willing away that familiar devil on her shoulder again as they defeated yet another pair of Nightbrothers, all of them shouting about the power they held and the ease of the fight before Cal ran them through with his blade. When she watched the lightsaber pierce the Nightbrother's chest, a sense of superiority came over her.

Feels good, doesn't it? Watching him kill for you? the devil said, and Y/n shut her eyes with a shake of her head.

He killed because the Nightbrother attacked us. Nothing more. Y/n told it back, realizing how crazy she was making herself. Talking to the voices in her head, especially on a place like this, wasn't something she considered to be normal.

But you want him to kill for you, don't you? To do anything for you? To kill your mother for you?

"Shut up," Y/n whispered to herself, unintentionally gaining Cal's attention.

"What was that?" he asked her curiously, a slight concerned look now painting his features.

Y/n panicked, but shook her head in response as she said, "I just thought I heard something. It's nothing. Let's keep moving."

She felt her stomach roll in her gut when Cal hesitated before he nodded, motioning for her to go as he followed. She let out a breath, rolling her eyes at herself in annoyance of her brain.

Cal watched her for a moment, his eyes raking over her as he followed her. He didn't know it, but he was feeling the exact same thing that she was. Only it wasn't a devil whispering on his shoulder, but simply his feelings for her starting to go wild as they drove deeper into Dathomir. He wished they could leave, and that Kujet's Tomb could be anywhere else in the galaxy. Hell, he'd even take it if the Astrium was on Coruscant. But of course, he had to be brought to one of the darkest planets in the galaxy, fighting himself instead of his enemies.

He could feel himself growing tired of simply watching her from afar and hiding his emotions. Embracing them, as Cere or Master Tapal would say. But nothing seemed such a good idea as acting on his impulses right now. Although deep in the back of his mind, he kept himself at bay. He knew it was Dathomir feeding these dark thoughts, like it was made to do, corrupting everything he felt in this single moment. BD helped a little, buzzing in his ear whenever he got too sidetracked. Luckily for the droid, BD wasn't affected, making him the only clear minded companion on their journey.

Cal closed his eyes for a moment, taking a deep breath as he centered himself once again. Meditation often helped with his unruly thoughts. All he could ever feel when meditating was the Force. It brought him back to himself. Opening his eyes once more, he looked to see Y/n glancing worriedly at him, the both of them knowing just how bad this place was. "Sorry. This place is just... like nothing I've ever felt from the Force before," he spoke as he straightened up.