Diere
Once I leave the party. I park into a parking lot because I can't see the road. What did I just see. August would never do that to me. Why did he do that to me? I get a notification on my phone and I pick it up hoping it's august telling me something that would make this all go away.
Ange 🪽: august is in the hospital
Diere: im on my way
Once I see that text I can feel my heart pummel in my chest . I drive to the hospital trying to stop myself from crying so I don't end up in the hospital too. Once I get there I tell the nurse im here for august and she tells me what rooms he in. When I walk to the room I see angel and lucas sitting outside.
"What happened" I say as angel stands up to cup my face. I wipe the tears away before she can. I've already been embarrassed enough for once day. Angel wraps in me in a hug and I almost start crying again.
"He passed out. He was having a panic attack" was it because of me?
"You guys can go I've got it from here"they nod ok as I step inside the room where august is hooked up to all kinds of wires and tubes. I sit down in the seat next to his bed. I can't bring myself to get any closer. I can't believe what he did with that girl and I know I was late but he didn't have to go hook up with another girl. I really thought that we would break the high school relationship stigma. I really want to believe he wasn't the one kissing that girl. But I as much as I want to be delusional about this it's just not me.
"Diere?" I break out of the trance I was in. I didn't realize he woke up.
"Hi" my voice cracking. I can't even look at him the same anymore." How are you-"
"I'm sorry I didn't mean to get that drunk. And I didn't mean to kiss her."
"You don't just suck face with someone by accident august!" I yell not meaning to raise my voice. How do you accidentally kiss someone. Is that really his reasoning. August looks down at the floor fidgeting with his rings. I can't do this right now. I take a deep breath trying to keep my cool.
" Let's not talk about this right now you should get some rest" as I get up to leave august grabs my arm.
"Please don't leave me alone" he says. And even though I can't look him in his eyes right now. I can't bring myself to leave him here alone on his birthday especially since his parents aren't here. He scoots over making room for me. I slide in next to him facing away from him and he wraps the blanket around us as we just sit there in silence because we both have too much to say and nothing to say.
Once I hear his breathing soften and his slight snores I slide out from under his arm. Keeping my composure until I finally reach the exit. Then I just break down. What am I gonna do.
"Diere?" I hear a voice calling my name. I turn around and it's my mom. I forgot she was working this shift. Once she realizes it's me and sees the state I am she tells who I'm assuming is her coworker that she's taking her lunch break. And runs to me engulfing me in a hug that breaks me .
"What happened bug" she says pulling away but still leaving her arms on my shoulder. I don't know if I should tell her because I know what she would say. My mom went through something similar in college she choose love over her career and got fucked over by some douche.
"August. He- he kissed someone else. He said he didn't mean to but I don't know we haven't been able to really talk about it and I don't know- I don't know if I will be ready to talk about" even though my gut was telling me that I shouldn't be encouraging a relationship I should focus on school august found some way to change my mind and now I feel like a idiot.
"Oh bug I'm so sorry. Even though I love august you have to know that he shouldn't have put himself in a situation like that"my mom says whispering it in my ear like he can hear us. Even after what he's done I know my mom still cares for him and so do I but I can never allow someone to heart me like this ever again. I pull away from my mom wiping the tears from my face.
"I know what I have to do" my mom nods and I run to the car to get august gift. I head back to his room and place the gift next to him and grabbing a piece of note paper and a pen.
Dear august,
I know you made a mistake and I love you so much that I can say I forgive you but I don't know if I'll ever be able to mean it. So I think that we should give each other some space because I won't be able to process this with you next to me
Love, diere
I place the note on the table next to him. I can't leave him hear alone so I grab his phone to call Ray.
August you cunt what the hell man I've been calling you all night
It's not august it's diere
Oh you guys were-
No august is in the hospital he had an anxiety attack. The nurses say it's not serious but they're keeping him overnight
What the hell then why are you crying
I'm not- me and august are breaking up I think
You're going to have to fill me in kiddo I'm on my way
I hang up the phone and sit on the chair across from august just sitting there listening to the faint buzzing sound of the hallways and the quick sound of feet pacing around.
"Hey diere I just signed august out. What the hell happened?" Ray asks out of breath.
"Uhm I saw august got drunk and was kidding some girl at the party and uh I left and I guess he freaked out and I'm sorry." He shakes his head in disbelief or maybe disappointment I can't tell.
"No I'm sorry that kid is gonna be the death of me. I thought he stopped drinking. What winch was he kissing?" He asks stuffing hospital food in his face and sitting down on the edge of the bed.
"Charlie"
"Charlie that bitch who raped him two years ago?!? That cunt should be in jail. She would be if august lousy parents weren't only worried about covering up her pregnancy." My face drops. Charlie was the one who august was talking about?!? And she got pregnant?! Why the hell didn't august tell me. Ray looks shocked at my response than a wash of guilt appears on his face.
"And he didn't tell you" he realizes face palming. I shake my head no.
YOU ARE READING
The insecurities of dating a white boy (bwwm)
Romance"You don't know how long I've waited just to be close to you like this" he admits and it makes my heart flutter that he thinks about me as much as I think about him "I like you so much" If my smile was any wider it would be hanging off my face. "I...
