A Whisper

Chapter 19

"Ms. Serenity we regret to inform you that Prince Mason is no longer with us. Last night his lungs collapsed due to smoke from a forest fire. He was cutting lumber after hours for extra money and a spark lit the woods into a burning pit. He was severely burned, but the cause of death was lack of oxygen to his lungs. I'm sorry for your loss." This letter was on my doorstep. No one had the guts to tell me. The feeling was numbing. My heart crumbled and collapsed. "The light wouldn't burn unless you let it take over your head." I hear the whisper. That was the meaning. Mason's death was taking over my head and burning me. He is gone. I am absolutely broken.

            "The light is useless unless you get close to it." God is the light. God is Him. God got me through my attacks from the beginning. I am getting closer to God. Mason didn't die because of the light, but because of the lack of oxygen. He lacked oxygen and his body shut down, as mine has so many times before. I go outside and lay in the very woods where both my brother and boyfriend died. I take one last deep breath and let go. It's time to find God. He is only a whisper in my reality, yet the pain enhances my senses; "God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our conscience, but shouts in our pain: it is His megaphone to rouse a deaf world." (C.S Lewis)