The World of Tomorrow (Rêve de Gosse #1)

Chapter 5

#TWOT5

"You should be careful with your lies, Fleur. Because someday, it might betray you."

Those words were pestering me for about days now. I should have not taken it seriously but here I am, bothered by those simple yet confusing words. I hate to admit it but I really don't understand what he meant by that. What was the message behind that one sentence? Was it a threat? Was it some kind of joke? What lies are he talking about? If I remembered correctly, I didn't have some kind of lie that might betray me like what he said.

Lies? What should be the reason for me to lie? Who should I throw my lies with? What should I lie about? Betray? Who would betray me? My family, friends, or the judgemental society? Sino sa kanila? Sino ang tinutukoy niya?

But why do I pay too much attention to that not-so-important statement? Why would I feel bothered? Who am I afraid of? Bakit sa isang simpleng salita na 'yon ay hindi mapakali ang buo kong kalamnan.

Ilang araw na ang nagdaan simula noong sinabi ni Aciano sa mismong mukha ko ang katagang iyon. Pero sa ilang araw na iyon ay walang oras na hindi ako nito binabagabag. Aaminin kong nakuha niya ang atensyon dahil lang sa mga salitang 'yon. I don't usually pay too much attention to some nonsense phrases but with that one simple word, I've been anxious for a few days.

Agad akong napailing. I should not think too much about it. Malay ko bang sinabi lang pala 'yon ni Aciano para lituhin ako . . . lituhin ang pag-iisip ko. Baka nga tumatawa na 'yon ngayon dahil nakuha niya akong paglaruan sa mga simpleng salita na galing mismo sa kanya. Kung ako lang ang tatanungin, malamang sa malamang na naghihiganti 'yon sa akin. After all, we're not on good terms.

"Earth to Fleur! Are you even listening?!" Bumalik ang aking diwa sa reyalidad ng sigawan ako ni Daniella sa mismong pagmumukha ko. Ilang beses pa akong kumurap dahil sa gulat.

"I'm sorry. What is it again?" Tanong ko nang napagtantong wala akong naintindihan ni isa sa pinag-uusapan naming apat.

"May problema ba, Fleur? You're not with yourself kanina pa," nag-alaalang tanong sa akin ni Ashley. Despite being shocked by her sudden question, I still manage to smile at her, a reassuring smile.

Ashley barely talked to me. Kaya hindi ko mapigilang magulat nang tanungin niya ako bigla. Hindi ko mapigilang bigyan siya ng magaan na ngiti. Among with my three friends, I am confident that Ashley's the most sincere one between Daniella and Julia. And was the most sympathetic one in our circle.

"Ah . . . Nothing. Just thinking about some useless random things." I shrugged my shoulders.

I don't know why I can't tell them what's on my mind. Well, it's not that important to share it with them, right? At isa pa, hindi naman 'yon big deal para ipagsabi ko pa sa mga kaibigan ko. I don't want to bother them with my personal problems either.

Do I really don't want to bother them or I just don't feel comfortable opening my mouth with them?

What's with the hesitation?

What's with the doubt?

Bakit ako nagdadalawang-isip sabihin sa kanilang may bumabagabag sa akin given the fact that they're my friends? Bakit hindi ko magawang ibuka ang aking bibig at ibahagi sa kanilang may gumugulo sa aking isipan? Bakit ako nahihirapan? Bakit ako nagdadalawang-isip? I shouldn't feel this way towards them, especially given the fact that we've been friends for quite some time now. This is insane!

I shook the idea out of my mind and focus on our topic. Ilang minuto rin kaming natahimik. Ilang minuto rin naming hinayaan ang katahimikang punuin ang area namin. My friends just give me a weird look, hindi naniniwala sa dahilan ko. Alam kong gusto nilang magtanong. Alam kong gusto nilang malaman kung ano ang laman ng isip ko. But instead of voicing out their questions, they choose to shut their mouths.