Shattered Souls

Chapter 15

I was up early the following day, watching the sun rise over the water. After spending multiple nights asleep in a chair in Jonah's hospital room, it was strange to sleep in our bed again. Jonah was still asleep, his breathing deep and even. I'd hardly slept the night before, afraid that he might stop breathing if I did. There was another reason for my insomnia, however. As hard as I'd tried, I couldn't stop thinking about my explosion yesterday.

I'd been dealing with my depression for a long time and thought I'd gotten it mostly under control. I had my family and Waverly, and I had Jonah—I'd thought I was doing good. But even all of that couldn't stifle the warring emotions inside me, the ever-present voice, twin to the devils on my shoulders, and the depression smothering me with every breath.

Every so often, the darkness inside me would rear its ugly head—reminding me of my every flaw, how worthless and weak I was. It was a never-ending battle, one I wasn't sure how long I could keep fighting. I was so tired. I wasn't even sure I remembered what true happiness felt like. Sure, I could still smile and laugh, most of them genuine. But sometimes, they faded a little too quickly.

I recalled Dad's face when I'd swum back into the hospital yesterday—the relief mixed with concern as he glimpsed my face, the way his eyes darkened as he noticed my raw and bruised knuckles. I hated that he worried about me, hated the concerned and pitying glances I got from him and the rest of my family.

I knew that part of my depression had stemmed from the Sirens, from how Kailani and Mica had used and manipulated me. But I also knew that some of it had been my doing—the way I'd constantly pushed down my emotions, refused to let myself feel anything.

Because I knew that if I let myself feel, I wouldn't be able to go on. I'd lock myself in our room and never come out. That darkness was a result of me numbing my emotions. Now, as hard as I tried, I couldn't numb them. Depression; sadness; anger; regret; grief; guilt—they swarmed around me, waiting for the best chance to rear their ugly heads.

When Jonah's parents showed up, it shocked all of us. Knowing that Jonah had dealt with—and was still dealing with—some of those very same emotions had caused me to break down.

I would never, ever resent Jonah, nor would I ever hate him for his actions. I knew that he regretted his past choices, some of which I knew still haunted him. He'd never told me explicitly, but I knew he hated what he'd had with Kailani. Knowing what he knew now about her and her fellow Sirens, he wanted to take her down as much as I did.

My eyes widened as a terrifying thought occurred to me, one I hadn't even considered until now. Zander wouldn't seek out Raina and convince her to join him... Would he? That was the very reason she'd left, after all. I wouldn't put it past him to stoop that low, but it wasn't something we'd ever considered.

I was suddenly jolted out of my thoughts by a gentle hand on my arm. I looked up, expecting it to be Mom or Dad, but when obsidian eyes met my own, my heart skipped a beat. Uncle Kai floated above me, his face grim and haggard. I opened my mouth, but he quickly shook his head as he reached for my hand. I took it wordlessly as we swam out of our room and into the hallway.

"Is everything okay?" I asked, my voice barely above a whisper. I took in his ragged appearance: the shirt he'd hastily shoved on before swimming over here, the hair in disarray. His eyes were also bloodshot, a detail I hadn't noticed until now. I knew before he'd even opened his mouth that whatever he was about to say would not bode well for any of us.

"There's been another murder," he said quietly, but nothing could mask the impact of his words. I took a stroke backward, trying to organize my tangled thoughts. I hadn't even considered—though, considering the circumstances, I really should have—that Zander's reach would extend beyond Pelathas.

"A group of mermaids found the body near the palace about an hour ago and reported it to Mom, who then relayed the news to Nerissa and Jay. It was a young mermaid, probably around my and Izzy's age. There was something strange about it, though.

"It bore no signs of lacerations or wounds from sharp objects. There was a significant amount of blood, yet upon further examination, no entry or exit wound." He rubbed his eyes as he finished speaking, exhaling heavily. I'd be willing to bet that neither he nor Aunt Izzy had gotten much sleep last night.

My heart skipped a beat as I took a sharp breath. Almost immediately, Zander's face flashed in my mind. "D-do you have any theories of who could have done it?" I stumbled over my words, hoping he didn't notice.

He swallowed hard before responding. "No. Jay wanted to be the one to come and tell you, but Mom and I agreed that he needed to stay in Aegrem, where it was safe. Will you pass it on to your parents?" He turned to leave, then, almost as quickly, spun back around and met my eyes. There was such fierceness in his gaze that I nearly faltered. "Be careful, Faye. All of you."

I let out a breath I hadn't realized I was holding. After he'd quietly slipped out, I turned and came face-to-face with Dad. I hadn't even heard him come in.

"Was that Kai?" he asked. For a moment, I couldn't answer. All I could think about was Uncle Kai's words, the implication in them. Another murderer—one capable of killing Sirens and merfolk alike.

"Yeah," I finally answered. "He..." I trailed off, wrestling with my tangled thoughts. Dad stared at me expectantly, concern and worry in his grey eyes. "There's been another murder, this time in Beltmare."

At Dad's shocked expression, I rushed on, wanting to rid my brain of the image as quickly as possible. "A group of mermaids found the body near the palace about an hour ago and reported it to Queen Katrina, who then relayed it to Aunt Nerissa and Uncle Jay. It was a young mermaid, probably around Aunt Izzy and Uncle Kai's age.

"He said there was something strange about it, though. It bore no signs of lacerations or wounds from sharp objects. There was a significant amount of blood, yet upon further examination, no entry or exit wound." He rubbed a hand down his face as I finished speaking.

I squeezed my eyes shut, took a deep breath, and exhaled deeply before opening them again. "What are we going to do? If Zander's reach already extends to Beltmare, what's to stop him from hitting Nepptheas and Aegrem too? And what about Aquireth?" I knew I was rambling, but I couldn't stop myself.

Fear and anger and anxiety came together to form a knot in my stomach. Almost immediately on their heels was a realization, one that all but stole the water from my lungs. Uncle Kai's words floated through my head, their implications evident.

"'He said there was something strange about it, though. It bore no lacerations or wounds from sharp objects. There was a significant amount of blood, yet upon further examination, no entry or exit wound.'" There was only one weapon I knew of that could inflict that specific type of wound.

I'd only heard about it in passing, but there was no doubt that's what had caused it—the Lost Soul Pendant. The very notion sent shivers down my spine. But just as quickly as the thought had surfaced, another one took its place, equally as puzzling. Aunt Izzy destroyed it years ago.

That realization sent a bolt of fear through me, so much so that I outwardly shuddered. Jonah took a deep breath, his chest rising and falling steadily as he rolled over in his sleep. Dad noticed the movement, eyes scanning my face. "What is it, Faye?" he asked, his words barely audible.

All I could think about—something that scared me even more than the news of the murder—was how Aunt Izzy and Aunt Nerissa had to be handling it. I knew the Lost Soul Pendant had been the source of suffering and agony for them.

I let out a ragged breath, tears filling my eyes. "This changes everything," I whispered, covering my face with my hands as sobs wracked my body. I felt Dad pull me into his arms and stroke my hair as I cried, but nothing could extinguish the bone-chilling fear that had taken root inside me.

I could only hope that we would be able to uncover the pendant's location before it was too late. Before Zander did something he wasn't able to take back.

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