Platform Souls

Chapter Six - Sister

Friday, October 12th

'I wanted to talk to you about Evan,' said Chloe.

'Oh, what about him?'

We were on the route 248 bus timed at 08.01. Chloe and I didn't always travel together, because if one of us was running late or we'd had an argument, there were two further buses within eight minutes: thank you, mayor Boris!

The 248 picks-up kids for three schools in Upminster, plus a load of city commuters bound for the station. Chloe had chosen us two seats on the top deck between a throng of girls belonging to the Catholic school, engrossed in their own conversations which didn't sound very reverential.

'So, you've been dinner dating for a while,' Chloe said. 'Do you want it to go further, with Evan?'

I turned my head to look my little sister in the eye. It was going to be one of those conversations.

'Yeah, I'd love it to go further,' I said.

'Okay. So... have you told him that?'

'No!'

'Have you dropped any hints, even?'

'No... I don't think so. I don't know what he wants, or whether he's straight, bi or whatever.'

'Okay, Jack. So, have you thought about starting conversations which gently lead to the subject of us, and your feelings?'

'No! He's not talked about us!'

'No, Jack. I asked whether you had thought about starting that conversation?'

'Ahh, no. I'm waiting for him to say something. I don't want to embarrass him or put him under pressure.'

'Shit, boys are so difficult!'

'What?'

'Look, sorry, because I know you find this hard, but you're a lovely guy with so much to offer the world. You need to take a deep breath, dare to open-up, and start asking Evan some questions, in a very careful way.'

'Well he could do the same, if he wanted.'

'Yes, Jack, but he sounds equally useless, and this is seriously frustrating me from a distance!'

'I don't even know if he likes me.'

'What? He's dinner dating you at least once a week. I'd say it's a pretty safe bet he likes you, one way or another.'

'And if not?'

'Well, wouldn't you rather know now, than waste another three months on him? Pizza is actually bad for the heart.'

'You just made that up.'

'Okay... look... just see if you can find an opportunity to talk about the thing boys hate talking about.'

'What?'

'Feelings, Jack. Warm, tingly feelings especially.'

'It's hard, though. Especially around the gay thing. I don't want to get outed, if he reacted really badly to anything I said.'

'You think he'd have that little respect for you, after all this time?'

'I dunno,' I shrugged.

'Okay, enough. My work is done. Have 'friend' dinner dates into retirement, but don't blame me for your sexual frustration.'

'Sssh!'

Chloe put her earbuds in, and we sat in silence for the rest of the journey past the windmill and beyond the railway station. Dangerously perceptive for 15, Chloe had done a great job in keeping my confidences and maintaining total ignorance of the Evan situation, when Mum tried to probe her. Faithfully, the probing was reported straight back to me.

Three things to consider about my sister are that she knows my issues, she's my number one supporter, and she is sometimes catastrophically wrong with her situational assessments. Still, I thought a lot about what she'd said, over the course of the morning.

At lunchtime, I sent Chloe a message which prompted a short exchange:

So, on ET, what questions do you think I should ask him?

Haha. I knew you'd think it through!

Yeah. So?

Hmm... let me ask the Yr10 witches coven. Will brb.

Anonymise me, pls.

Yeah, ofc.

Not actually easy, is it!?

Go eat yr lunch!