The Girl Who Couldn't Kill

Chapter 17.5-Rory's Thought Journal #4

Mr. Volkov's weekly assignments

Topic: Logic

To me, Bacon's "Idols of the Theatre" is the consumerism of society's ideal perfectionism when it comes to public displays of decency to impress an audience. Essentially, we, ourselves are the product that is envisioned as the desired, we have the tendency to impress the people around us in order to gain approval. In comparison, our audience is our main consumer, we advertise what we want others to see. People mold themselves to better fit the "stereotypes" or visions of what people around us that are deemed as "acceptable". For example, this could come from a(n) family member, a friend, an elder, or the influence of social media standards. Knowing the consequences of the "Idols of the tribe" and the "Idols of the Cave" one can be embedded in their perceptions that it ends up derogating themselves into depression.

My experiences with Friendship are one form of distortion that has continually altered my personality and mind. Starting from a young age I have always been taught to be polite when it comes to greeting elders and family friends. It was in my perception that being polite is what will bring me acceptance, and as a result, was the only thing I cared about. I thought that I desperately needed to be "nice" to be liked, and before I knew it, I could not fathom the idea of not being liked. My "Idols of the Tribe" have been set and that was my goal from then on. One time in grade 1 or 2, I remember this super cool girl that was fairly skilled in the monkey bars and I really wanted to be her friend. So one day I asked my friend to introduce me to her and the first thing that I said was,

"Can I be your friend?"

No introduction, no name, I just went straight to the point. She looked at me with confusion before she hesitated and said, "No sorry, I have too many friends right now."

I was ultimately embarrassed and confused. I was so nice and approaching, why was she so mean? This was what I had thought at the time. It did not cross my mind at the time that my approach was both intimidating and overwhelming. This was a detrimental punch in the face to my confidence as I had originally thought this situation would be a milestone for my younger self.

This situation comes into play with Bacon's "Idols of the Theatre," where my mental obstruct was that if I could claim a good first impression, I was able to obtain what I wanted even when the words "Can I be your friend," did not particularly have any substance. Because what really, as Bacon says the "Idols of the marketplace," is the definition of a "friend?" A close friend, a best friend, or just a friend? This is a lousy word that doesn't specifically address the word "friendship." This is unexplanatory when it comes to meeting a new individual because nothing is guaranteed once you actually form a bond with someone.

After a long time, I believe this unconscious behavior of "impressing" someone becomes a bad habit, and you become a "people pleaser." I believe everyone is a form of their own people pleaser. But I don't think it's wrong to please someone that you care about or like, it all depends on how it is expressed. When it comes to interacting with a people pleaser (from my basic judgment and scrutiny) I've come to the conclusion that they are extremely persuasive and manipulative. They tend to use their skills and abilities to impress others and further share their personal thoughts and opinions. Generally speaking, if someone is truly dedicated to forming a bond/friendship with you, they tend to want to spend more time with you before sharing anything personal. It is the "Idol of the Tribe" for certain people to think in a more observant manner due to embedded beliefs from a young age; they tend to be more precautious.

The idea that the "idols of the cave" reflect a lot of what happens in high school. In the midst of finding oneself, one is always seeking ways to "fit in," or oftentimes not. Because of stereotypes and conformity, everyone is desperately trying to fit in one way or another. Therefore, there are many fallacies that I believe are often inaccurate and irrelevant such as "Being popular makes you better" or "You are limited to staying within a friend circle and only able to hang out with them every day" The list can go on and on because teenagers have the tendency to be extremely judgemental. (Not saying that I am not a teenager. But I often contemplate this.) I think one of the reasons why I think about this so much is that I moved around a lot when I was young and have grown accustomed to observing people's behavior and have many different friends of all cultures.

By virtue of avoiding the distortion of reality, specifically the "Idols of the theatre," I believe it is crucial to reorganize our minds in order to think differently by putting "ourselves" first in line for our own happiness and inner peace. That means...PUTTING YOURSELF FIRST BEFORE OTHERS. A person should not solely gain happiness from the acceptance of others but rather from the acceptance of oneself. Having a small group of close friends is the best thing one can ask for, compared to wasting time mingling with a bunch and never finding the right friends. It's hard in this modern generation to find people of the same values and interests in high school but it is not impossible. With that being said, it does not mean one should constantly group themselves with their "best" friends all the time. To me, it's just a sense of loyalty and having genuine care for people you are you trust and care about...Many people see this in the wrong light of announcing "friendship" as something to boast about, especially in a high school of social hierarchy. Where, really, is the opposite of what friendship is. Idealistically, it should be an equal balance of friends, family, self-care time, and being open to new opportunities and friends.

In honor of the legendary fashion designer Givenchy, who once said, "The dress must follow the body of a woman, not the body following the shape of the dress" (Givenchy).

(I have recently started re-watching a show on Netflix and really liked this quote one the character says.) I think of the "dress" as our personality, a customed uniqueness of our own, both precious but surprisingly adaptable depending on the environment. The connotation of a "dress" expresses femininity. A shapeless silhouette that is only shaped by the person who is wearing it, hence the very thing that shapes our individuality and uniqueness. Our "personality" should be designed to fit our bodies in how we want to express and show ourselves. One's personality should not be a pre-made mold that one fits themselves into because that mold can become isolating and intoxicating, deteriorating our "Idols of the mind.

7/10. Interesting concepts, Rory. Good effort on writing about Bacon's Idols of the Mind. It was great to see you incorporate some personal experiences but next time, remember to add more philosophy and terminology!