Stated Love

Chapter 15

Today, Haboba and my parents are headed to the airport for New York. They decided to take a plane again, since Haboba was joining them. "Goodbye, please don't forget to say the duaa (prayer) for travel, Inshallah." I take turns with my siblings, hugging Mama first, then, Baba, and Haboba. "Take care of your siblings, ok?" Mama tells Bashir. He nods, hugging her again. I really am going to miss them. And Jidu. All we could do is make duaa that he gets better, Inshallah.

A few days passed with the house empty, just my siblings and I. Tonight, Sahar was sleeping over since Bashir was taking a night shift. Walaa didn't seem to mind, she was simply tucked away in her room. I crossed the street to Khalto Rasha's house and Sara answers the door. "Hi, are you looking for Sahar? Come on in!" She dashes back to her Barbie Dream House and he dolls, which are spread all over the living room carpet. "Salam Khalto; Sara let me in," I say. Khalto Rasha's face peeps out of the kitchen and she smiles. After she makes me taste test her chicken and rice, I dart up to Sahar's room. "Hey, you ready?" I ask, after knocking and entering her room. "Yeah," Sahar packs her pajamas and skin care into a pink duffel bag. "Are you sure Bashir won't be there?" She debates whether or not bring an extra Hijab and hoodie. "Yeah, I'm sure but probably bring a hoodie just in case, you never know." She throws her Nike hoodie into the mix and we head out of her room. "Ok, Mama, goodnight. I'll see you tomorrow morning, Inshallah," Khalto Rasha hugs and kisses us both and before we could leave, she passes me a tray full of platters of chicken, rice, and a salad. "Since your parent away, you no eat. Here, hope you like my food, Inshallah." I can't refuse; Khalto Rasha's a wonderful cook, Mashallah. On our way out, Sahar and I are giggling, excited for our first sleepover. 

At home, we do each others skin care, do our makeup, dance, and sing kareoke to our favourite songs. Eat all the snacks we can lay our hands on, and make some Tik Toks to save on our drafts. And finally, I lay down on a sleeping bag and Sahar on my bed, chatting. I always give the guest the bed. It's something my parents have taught me from a young age, to always treat the guest with the best. "So you confessed your feelings first, not him?" I shush her with my finger. "Shhhhh, Walaa might hear! I haven't told her yet!" I whisper-shout. After my worry, I nod, feeling myself turning hot. "But he said, and I quote, 'I'll wait for you because you're worth it'. I mean, who really says that these days?!" I gush. Sahar lays on her stomach and kicks her feet back and forth. "Aww, that's so cute! You never really find guys like that these days," I know who she's talking about when her expression shifts and she becomes hot tempered. "Salman is a lost cause at this point, although I hate saying it. And he looks up to Baba. I don't even know if I should call him that because of all he's done to our family. He's practically abandoned us!" I don't know what to do, so I stare at her and nod in agreement. "Sorry. I hate it when I talk about myself and my problems too much. Who am I worrying about my daddy and brother issues when your grandpa's really sick and his life is on the line. I'm so so sorry Wallahi. How have you and your family been holding up?" I shake my head. "No, no, it's ok, Sahoora. Your problems are valid to talk about too, it's not like it's a competition," I take a handful of popcorn and stuff it in my mouth, chewing. After I swallow, I continue. "Honestly, it's been hard but they're all so quiet about it, which I hate. Jidu and I have always been close so it's difficult to face reality, you know? I just miss him so much." I sigh, my chest heaving. Sahar rubs my back and I begin to cry in silent sobs. "Don't worry, it's going to be ok, Inshallah. Here, let's focus on positive things, ok?" I nod, wiping at my nose with my sleeve. "Yeah, I agree." We spend the rest of the night playing cards and talking till' we fall asleep. 

That whole morning was a blurb for me. It was weird. I woke up to being shaken. "Alaa, wake up," Walaa wails. I push her off and turn to the other side, frowning. She gives me one more shove till I wake up, hot from anger. "Alaa he's gone!" Her face is red and puffy. She doesn't look like she got much sleep. I look to my bed and see it made. Sahar left. The analog clock propped up on my desk reads 12:37. Had I really slept in that much? I scrunch my face up in confusion. "Wait what, what's wrong? Why are you crying? What happened?" I ask. Walaa cries again. Bashir steps into the doorway, head bowed down. He looks like he'd been crying as well and like he hadn't gotten any sleep at all. "Jidu's dead."