Never feel alone

Chapter 23

warning: this chapter contains some descriptions of abuse)

Stef

Lindsey agreed to meet with us the next day. After I got off the phone with her, I went to find Callie and Sophia. "How would you two like to take a little road trip with me tomorrow?" I asked. I figured that if Lindsey could see their faces, the sadness in their eyes, she might be more compelled to speak up for them. I knew I would.

So, in the morning, the three of us drove to Lindsey's home. As we headed up her front walk, the blondest little girl I'd ever seen watching us through the screen door. She waved to us excitedly as I rang the bell.

Seconds later, Lindsey scooped her up in her arms and opened the door for us. "You must be Stef? I'm Lindsey."

I nodded. "Yes, nice to meet you."

"Come on in," she said. She adjusted the toddler on her hip. "This is Gracie."

"Hi Gracie," I smiled. "Aren't you a pretty girl?" Gracie smiled, wriggling free from her mom's grasp. "This is Callie, and Sophia," I said, introducing her to each of the girls.

"Hi," she said, a sad smile creeping onto her freckled face. She turned back to me. "Um, I'd like to talk to you in private, if that's okay?" She glanced back at the girls nervously.

"Of course," I said. "I understand.

"Maybe Callie and Sophia could take Gracie out to the back yard to play?" she offered. "Is that alright?"

"It's fine," I nodded. "Okay with you, girls?"

They nodded. "Yay, I love babies!" Sophia grinned, taking Gracie's chubby hand. Gracie led her and Callie out the back door to a swing set.

Lindsey sat down and I joined her. She picked at her nails nervously. "I can't help but ask," she said, with a small, nervous laugh. "Who the hell in their right mind would give my dad kids?"

"I don't know," I said quietly. I still hadn't told her that Brian was dead. I didn't have the heart to do it over the phone. I knew it was inevitable, though. However, I couldn't help but worry. I had no idea how Lindsey would react. If she knew how he died, would she still help us?

"I have some news for you," I told her. I looked past her shoulder toward the back door. Sophia was pushing Gracie on a baby swing. Callie was sitting on the edge of a sandbox, watching the house wistfully, probably wishing she were a fly on the wall. "I'm sorry to have to tell you this," I said, "but your father passed away recently."

Lindsey blinked, her pale lashes fanning her expressionless face. "I don't know what to say," she said. "I just... oh my gosh. How? What happened?"

"He was shot," I told her, holding back the details.

Lindsey ran her hands over her face. When she took them away, there were tears in her eyes.

"I'm so sorry," I said, reaching out to lay my hand on her shoulder, rubbing it gently.

She nodded. "I just feel like a huge weight's been lifted off my shoulders," she said quietly. "I know I should be crying because he was my dad, and he's dead. But I'm crying because I finally feel free. Is that terrible of me?"

"No," I told her. "Everyone processes their feelings differently. And I know that you didn't have the best relationship with him."

"I suppose you want me to tell you about him?" she asked, wiping her tears. "About the abuse."

"Take your time," I said. "There's no rush."

She sucked in a gush of breath. "I'm ready. I want to talk about this." She balled a tissue in her hand, and took a few more shaky breaths. "I need to talk about this."