The anti-fan

Who would be the person.....?

Taeyeon's pov:

- Of course that I'm right, I'm Kim Taeyeon! - I said. We both laughed. The room became quiet again. I was curious how it was possible for Jessica to never experience any form of love. I mean, was it even possible?
Who would be the person who would have to put up with her? Who would love her as a person and not as an idol? Maybe that's another reason why she's single - maybe she's asking herself the same questions. Will there be such a thing as true love for her? Will she be able to love someone for real? Are they both going to be able to handle their relationship and Jessica's hard lifestyle at the same time? If not, will Jessica give up her profession for her relationship or her relationship for her profession?
Jessica's love life is arranged in a very complicated way. I feel sorry for her and her future eventual partner. I hope that he will be in an easier situation. Because if both of them are surrounded by all kinds of factors hindering their relationship, I don't know what they will do! I hope that they will be strong and patient enough. Hopefully, because I'm not going to put up with Jessica for the rest of my days.
To be fair, could anyone, purely real, have more patience for her than me? I mean, I'm not doing it for anything. I just have to. I gave a promise to several people!
Jessica's lover has to be even more patient than me. Oh, Kim Taeyeon, who is going to be the lucky boy who will end up with you? I giggled in my mind.
- Good night! - I broke the silence. We both were quiet and tired, so I just came up with that. I turned my body facing the wall.
- So suddenly? - Jessica asked.
- I'm tired. It's half past one am already.
- Arraso...tomorrow wake up early and make me a breakfast, slave!
I letted a small sigh. Jessica giggled.
See? Jessica has to find a lover who would make her breakfast without being forced to.

An hour passed, and I couldn't still fall asleep. I was wondering if I really had feelings for Kyung. This feeling around him was not new to me. If I tell him about my feelings? Wouldn't that be a little childish? Also, what if my parents marry me to some stranger? If I am in a relationship while getting married, I don't know what will happen with me and Kyung. Also, wouldn't I play with his feelings by that way? I'm telling him that I love him and then suddenly I'm getting married to another man. I know that he would understand, but I will take his chances to find another woman who would love him as much as I do. Maybe I just have to......

A pair of cold hands went through my shirt. What was happening......?

I felt Jessica's body moving closer to mine. Her hands caressed my stomach, her legs wrapped around mine, her face pressed against my neck. I could smell her rich and light perfume again. Like the time, when she was playing with my hair in the library. This time, I wasn't seeing her again, but I knew that it was her. Well, normal, we both were in the room. Why was she doing that? Was she dreaming? I had goosebumps all over my body from the unexpected move Jessica did.
-Jessica, what are you doing? - I asked quietly because I wasn't sure if she was still asleep. I removed her hands from my stomach and faced her. The distance between our faces was really, really short. I could feel her mint breath.
- Sooyeon?
- Sorry, you just reminded me of Soojung in this shirt. I didn't want to...um...make you feel uncomfortable. - she replaid. I didn't know what to say nor to react. I just turned my back facing her again. What else was I supposed to do? Her confess was just so sudden...
- Go to sleep already. - I said.
- I know that it would be strange...but can you give me five more minutes?
- What.....?
- Just five more minutes. I promise that I will not tell anybody. - Jessica said and then put her hands over my waist slowly. I lettet big gulp. I was feeling so strange. I could feel something tickling my stomach. Jessica pulled me closer and put her face in my neck again.

Just five minutes.

I wasn't feeling uncomfortable. It reminded me of that time in the library again. My mind was screaming ,,That's Jessica, what are you doing?!" but my heart was telling me ,,She is Jessica. She is being herself with you. Would you stop her from that?". Would I stop a person from their feelings when I was always stopped? I even had to forget about my feelings in order to help my parents' buissness.
I letted her being. I didn't mind her hug. To be honest, now I realize that we are pretty similar. Pretty similar and at the same time so different.