The Baroness of Renin

Chapter 3-Theodora

I had hesitated outside the great hall for what seemed like hours, willing myself with all my strength to turn invisible. Alas, whatever magic my ancestors were purported to have had was not inherited by me. I paced back and forth, becoming intimately familiar with every stone and pebble beneath my boots. As I did so, I patently tried to avoid the gaze of each passerby, as if they didn't exist at all.

The few times I did make eye contact, albeit by mistake, I attempted a smile. On each occasion, however, my friendliness was met with nothing but scowls and gasps.

One particular pair of guests was especially unkind. They were in outrageous colors, with the woman bedecked in so much jewelry it's a wonder she could walk. I had given them a nod and a hint of a smile, resting my gaze above their shoulders. They had merely stared at me wide-eyed, the man pulling his companion closer to him than would be deemed appropriate in polite society. The woman clasped her necklace with all her might as if I might tear it off her at any moment.

I grimaced. They needn't act so stand-offish. I don't bite, and I am not going to steal her necklace and pawn it off for bread. They are in no danger. Despite this being the case, the pair hurried past me. The moment they were out of my sight, I heard their cruel whispers.

"Did you see how ridiculous she looked? Have Sa'maryan standards lowered so much?"

"In my day, royalty was respected, they'd never let one of her kind in. They are just asking for trouble."

I sighed, feeling my throat tighten. Tears threatened to spill down my face and make Josephine's cosmetic job all for not. Oh, how I'd love to give the two a scathing setdown with a swat of my glove to their faces. Then I'd hitch up my skirts, locate my carriage, and return home as quickly as possible, never to set food in the capital again.

Do I truly need to be here? Certainly, I must have a long-lost cousin somewhere. I could send out an investigator to locate him, have him legitimized... Would that my father had sired a bastard child himself; he would have been better received than a Moor any day, I thought to myself wryly.

Alas! Such thinking was foolish. The king would have my head if I refused his summons, especially given the fact that my family had already pushed his good graces to the limit. After the humiliation of one of his most trusted court officials marrying a Moor, I knew he had very little goodwill to spare. The last thing I needed was to test his patience further, causing him to drag me out from my estate like a common criminal.

I shook my head. Non, leaving was not an option. I had to face my fate with pride. I took a breath, steeling my gaze. I straightened my back, forcing myself to appear every inch the lady I was. I imagined the weight of a half dozen books pressing against my head, the way my mother had so often arranged to be done in order to perfect my posture. But that had been nothing when compared with the weight of taking those last few steps towards the Great Hall.

Before I could come to my senses, I forced myself to the massive wooden doors. I swallowed, making an effort to push down the anxiety that clawed at my throat and lungs. As I reached for the door handle, I found it opening as if by magic.

I stared at the doors in awe, but the feeling quickly faded as I saw the armed guards standing off to the sides of the entrance. They nodded to me in a nearly mechanical manner, as if I were just another guest. Nothing in their expression betrayed any kind of judgement whatsoever.

Oh, to be so emotionless. What a gift, I thought wistfully to myself. I inclined my head in thanks to the men, sashaying forward. I took in the room, noticing that, much to my chagrin, the dining table was across the Great Hall, as were the majority of the guests. I at once regretted my procrastination. Mayhaps if I had entered with others, I might have gone unnoticed.

Yet there I was, one woman confronting the entire court of Sa'mary. The din of chatter ended abruptly as one by one, servant and nobility turned my way. I swallowed, fighting with every ounce of strength I had to maintain the mask of bored disinterest that was currently gracing my face. There was no turning back now.