After Darkness

*22. The darkness*

The week had been wet, matching Gawin's mood. He tried to visit Krist several times, but his ex-boyfriend refused to see him. He didn't want to push it too hard either, because Krist wasn't doing well anymore, and he didn't want to make it worse. He and New talked about Krist's emotional state, mainly because he wasn't eating basically anything and wasn't sleeping either.

The last time Krist had faced such depression was after the death of his father. Perhaps losing his mother had been too much for him. New wasn't doing very well in college either because his was worrying about his best friend, and it wouldn't let him pay attention to anything.

For the last few days, Krist hasn't even responded when someone spoken to - which New takes as a signal to maybe call a doctor over to his house. But New's mother was against it. She was prejudiced against mental health issues; she thought psychiatrists and therapists were for crazy people - and this was definitely not the case with Krist. On Friday night, she and New had a heated discussion about the issue.

New left the house frustrated.

As he walked aimlessly down the street, New called Gawin. They needed to step in, do something. They couldn't wait for Krist's condition to get any worse.

Gawin was at a bar with Aye. The friend had insisted that he should go out for a while because being stuck at home worrying about Krist wasn't going to help the boy's situation. He resisted a little; but ended up agreeing.

"There is nothing you can do now, Gawin. It is beyond your power to help," Aye said calmly.

"Really, Aye? Should I just let Krist suffer while I cross my arms and wait for him to get better? Could you do that with was Apple who was suffering like Krist is right now?"

Aye was silent, and Gawin was sure what her answer would be. When we like someone, we don't just want to wait until the person gets back on their feet. Sometimes, we need to be the support they will need to take their first steps.

A waiter brought a new round of drinks for the pair. Gawin watched the people at the bar, all of them looking so relaxed and unconcerned. But were they really that way, or was it just a mask they wore in the presence of strangers?

"I'm not saying you should leave him to his own devices...", Aye tried to resume her argument.

"New and I want to take him to see a doctor, a therapist, anything. But New's mother has been making it difficult and Krist doesn't want to leave the house. We need to think of a solution."

"I don't want you to misunderstand what I'm saying. I'll help you think of something. I just don't want you to take on a responsibility that isn't yours... even more so now that you're not dating anymore."

That pissed Gawin off even more. He shook his head in disbelief.

"I don't need to be his boyfriend to worry and want him to be okay. I'm just not in that room every day because Krist doesn't want me there, which doesn't stop me from being worried about him every minute of my day. I won't help or not help him just if we go back to being a couple... In fact, even if he never wants to date me again, I'll still want to find a way to help him get out of this place where he finds himself. That's what you do when you love someone. I would do the same for you or any other friend of mine."

Aye started to say something, she seemed to have been hurt in some way, but Gawin cut her off before his friend could even say anything: "Think carefully about what you're going to say... please."

At that moment, New entered the bar and went looking for the table where Gawin was. The boy was so upset that he walked past Gawin without recognizing his friend. He went to the bar and ordered a shot of tequila. Drink in hand, he looked again for Gawin, this time finding his friend.