01 | A Battle for Self

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Sobia

There are millions of people in the world yet I feel so alone

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There are millions of people in the world yet I feel so alone. Everyone have atleast one of their favourite person. That could be their friend, siblings, cousin, lover or family. With whom they share their difficulties, their trauma, their happiness and everything.

But I don't have such favourite person, with whom I could share the storm that was taking place inside my heart, in my life.

Home was supposed to be a place where you seek peace. Home is supposed to be a place where you run whenever you face any problem knowing very well that there are people who will support you blindly always. Home isn't a house where you stay but the people that love and cherishes you.

But for me, home is totally opposite. Home was supposed to be heaven, but it was hell for me. Home was a prison for me, where my wings, my freedom were brutally snatched away. Home has become the source of my anxiety and depression.

People usually have daddy issues. But for me, it is totally a different matter. I had family issues. I always had a constant urge to run away from this so called family and live a life far away from them. But there ain't any safe place in the world for a girl or woman with such twisted and devilish people in the world. And that alone thought vanishes the thought of running away.

I was brought out of my thoughts, my gaze lost at the dark yet beautiful sky, my grip tightens at the glass of mango juice that I was helding.

I could feel a presence behind me, before the person could say anything, I turned around. I almost rolled my eyes as I take in the girl standing in front of me, the perfect specimen of a daughter that my mother always wished.

Falaq Rehmaan was a beauty with brain, that almost every mother wish to have her, either as a daughter or daughter-in-law. And unfortunately my mother was one of those people who wanted her as a daughter in law. But she couldn't succeed, as Falaq was already engaged to a well established and successful lawyer, Shahzain Shah.

At the age of twenty three, she was a successful and respected teacher. Beside her professional life, she was a good daughter that everyone adores, doing all the households chores, respecting elders, speaking in a soft honey voice. Never once fighting with anyone.

Slightly towering my 5'3 height, her fair skin glowed with slight makeup. Her long black healthy hair was tied in a high ponytail. Wearing a Pakistani suit, she look dazzling.

We both were quite opposite. She was as sweet as Gulab Jamun, whereas I was as bitter as vinegar.

Like me she was holding a glass too, but a watermelon juice, her engagement ring shines under the moonlight.

"When are you getting married? It's about time you get married. After all, all our friends are getting married too."

There was the same question that I had been listening since I turned twenty. People my age were either getting married and having a child or was either successful in their professional life or some were blessed with both.

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